Month: September 2015

My boys go to a school that wound up on the news tonight. The story was about how the Charter school CEO came down to the high school and fired the principal and VP on the spot. The reality of what happened is somewhat different. Both P and VP are out and the CEO did come down there and handle it personally–handled it badly I might add. Still, beyond that lies a lot of media spin and the anger of parents and teachers who, though badly mishandling the situation, have every right to be mad.

My boys are in the k-8 side of the school. The pair that go there have never known another k-8 school. Now at least one of the boys seems to be on the verge of losing his teacher to this situation, given that many reports are surfacing that she has or will soon quit. This is the part that gets me angry and compels me to walk back through the story to find out the truth. See, I believe schools are really about teachers and without good teaching the school has little value. This teacher is one of four my son has had in his time there, and it doesn’t appear that any suitable replacement can be called up and brought to speed quickly. The other one is already dealing with a parade of substitute teachers as the result of a maternity leave, and isn’t learning much of anything this year. Still, this school and this community of parents seems worthwhile.

The real issue for me is how this got so out of control. I stand by the teachers and they in turn stand by the P and VP, but why did it spiral? A lot of people became vocal and someone called the news, that’s why. Now it is out of the hands of the parents and in the hands of a media hungry for a story and a resolution–no matter what that resolution winds up being. I’m worried the fallout will continue to spill over the the elementary side, and if that becomes the case, my boys will looking for a new school for the first time.

 

Some Thoughts:

1. I’ve given it a lot of thought and I believe there is something to why I’m disappointed about this year’s tackle season and team. At first I thought it was just about my kid’s lack of playing time. The main player went from scoring touchdowns on practically every carry to not being allowed to touch the ball and instantly becoming the lightest lineman on the team. He isn’t built that way, and the reasoning the coach gave, though cogent and valid in regards to the way he runs a team, is not at all sensible to me. You should not penalize a kid for not playing defense the way you want by taking him away from the position/side of the ball he is actually passionate about. I sat and watched him, learning all the weaknesses and things he needed to develop as a player and realized that there are absolute deficiencies in his game, but he is not being coached on how to correct them. In truth, the problem this year is coaching. I fear the coach has too much going on in his life, so as a result the players spend a significant portion of practice standing around or engaging in 11 starters on whatever bench player is left–usually my two boys. The starters learn the play beats and get a confidant rhythm against a D that is undermanned and outsized. It is basically an ego stroke for the starters and a pain clinic for the bench players. I am fully done with the whole experience this year and need to tune it out, before I get even more upset. Hopefully they win the championship like the boys want. Short of that, the season is largely a bust.

I was scanning the audible.com website when I came across yet another Elizabeth Gilbert (eat, pray, love) novel that strained the boundary between personal narrative and self-help. In truth, this latest effort feels a lot more like self-help than anything else. It set me to thinking about the genre in general and about how some people feel qualified to ‘preach’ about how to do things the right way whereas others don’t feel like they have the ethical or moral lungs to do so. Then I recognized something fundamental: All these people are really doing is talking about what worked for them and about how they were able to navigate the common difficulties of life and emerge intact. It set me to thinking about my own life and trials and learned experiences. This isn’t me saying I am going to write a self-help novel or even blog (unless that is in fact what I have been doing all along). This is me saying that all writing is in essence a form of that. We are always expressing experiences and trying to make sense of those experiences and our own choices. Every so often we figure out a routine that works and then, if we are very lucky, we get to share it with someone who it might affect in some small way.

1. Some Thoughts:
   This weekend marked my first win of the year in both leagues I am in. It also marked the first loss of the year for the Jets, first win for the Giants, and first win for my boys’ Jr. Pumas. That last bit is the most meaningful to me, because I got a chance to see the smile on their faces as a result of the victory.
2. That’s the good news. The bad is that a kid was carried out on a stretcher. A player from the Casa Grande JPW Rattlers suffered what appeared to be a head injury late in the 4th quarter. It is not clear how he was injured but since it was a head related injury, local authorities erred on the side of caution. I hope the kid is okay.
3. The disappointing part is the way the kids are being used in the games. On the one hand I am disappointed as a dad to see my eldest go from 6 tds in 7 touches to being the kid who doesn’t get to touch the ball at all and in truth is shoved on the offensive line as a ‘We gotta play him somewhere’ sort of play. The program he is a part of is starting to trouble me in general. The coaching style focuses on whole team activity vs. breaking kids up into groups and allowing them to move through stations for the 1:15 of practice they get twice a week. I have to defer to the coach, because he played college ball successfully a lot longer than I did, so has a sustained experience that level of coaching and also coaches a successful high school program—his second such program. On the other hand, high school kids come pre-loaded with a set of skills, which are usually learned at this level. I worry those fundamentals are being ignored in exchange for adherence to an offensive and defensive philosophy. Still, no helicoptering. They’ll learn this thing one way or another. In the end, I might just wind up teaching them myself.

I want to talk–nay, rant–about football and the state of the universe.

Let me start by saying this rant is powered by a bad Jets loss and, more fully, me having four kittens bent on destroying my home. I am someone who has claimed to be a ‘cat person’ for years, but four kittens and a momma who wants things just how she wants things for her kittens spells bad news, especially when there is a wimpy Yorkie involved. I don’t want to recount how many times I had to pull his whimpering butt out of a corner after being dominated by a kitten. It just isn’t cool, man. Not cool at all.

Also not cool: My lack of rhythm in fantasy football. I long labored under the impression that I was a fantasy impresario, a real candidate for fantasy consigliere to the stars. Maybe some of that would be true if I just figured out which of my instincts apply to this week or next week or the week after. Case and point: I saw something in Hankerson last week, enough to recognize the budding chemistry between him and Matty Ice. I did not, however realize the pitch count Roddy White has been on until just today. This in turn caused me to drop Rishard Matthews as a result of streaming receivers (poorly I might add) the week he scores 2 TDs to the tune of 100+ yards. Yeah, that isn’t happening next week, so hopefully I can snag him again in free agency, but the problem is I needed him this week. That or I need Manning to put up less than 30 fantasy points to record my first win of the year–that with Weeden and McCown (Luke at least) as my starters.

The fact is, I’m not putting in the necessary time to be truly great at breaking down football match ups. Sure, there are experts who do put in the time and still suck worse than me, but they ain’t me. I come pre-loaded with the belief that I can do anything I put my mind to. I haven’t ben proven wrong yet–yet I haven’t put my full energies to much of anything over the past decade. Perhaps that is a larger conversation to be shared. It seems like being good enough is good enough for most people.

Not sure it is good enough anymore for me.

 

 

The misogynistic fun fest that is Fox’s The Last Man on Earth is my latest binge/purge. TLMN is one of those shows that falls into itself as the first season moves towards climax. The main character begins to focus towards being a slightly better person and as such completes the rotund picture of who we would be should we be in his shoes. It isn’t high art, but I like it. In truth, there isn’t much that is good right now.

John Truby quipped that the best new stuff coming out is on TV, but I must admit that stuff is few and farm between. Above all else, that stuff is unsustainable, which is the curse of TV in some way. TV is meant to be sustainable in the old model. The new model ought to point to limited duration shows that maximize audience and have a complete character arc with a beginning, middle, and defined end in sight.

 

I’ve gotten to the point where I am starting to feel very good about the 2015-16 ‘work year’. I ended my summer with a burst of energy and faith in what was to come only to suffer snag after snag of disappointment. Now I’m at a point (and a place) where all feels good and right with the universe. I’m building towards something again, writing at an increasing pace, and starting to be more honest with myself about what I want and need.

Classes are fantastic again. This hasn’t happened in some time, but I can say that I enjoy every class I teach, though I enjoy them all in very different ways. Some are wonderful because of the challenge, the students, or both. I’ve pulled back as father-coach and recognize that it is far too soon to be crowning my kids as MVPs of all that is good in sports. In fact, I’m moving gradually back towards that idea of fundamentals–not just of a specific sport but mechanical fundamentals of body movement, exercise, and teamwork. I realize more and more that game-specific skills don’t mean all that much at this level. Right now it is more about how courageous a kid is and how patient they are and how much they trust the person standing beside them to do their job. Lofty concepts that can all be broken down into a simple game of capture the flag, 4 points, or sharks and minnows, which all remain the currency of good youth practices.

The writing remains a situation.
While I am writing more, I have yet to hit that stride that comes late in a project. Moreover, I haven’t found a way to carry that from project to project.

I have, on the other hand, found a stride when it comes to teaching and I am in a very happy place with that. If only I can combine the philosophies  into one smooth movement, life would be on fire…

I spent a lot of good years first learning and then getting caught up in the language of academia. I found myself wandering through monstrous diatribes about the completion agenda and outcomes and learning goals—all designed to teach me what makes a good teacher. Unfortunately, all any of it did was to remove me from personal instinct and teach me how to speak a language that is wholly foreign to students and in doing so, overlook the most important thing there is when it comes to teaching: learning.

 

My first time teaching I was thrown into a classroom full of honors students without any formal training. There was a class on teaching and I signed up for it the next day, but I learned as they learned, and I learned from them. Fortunately, I had an advantage in this situation. I’d been around teachers my entire life. My mother taught in a resource room for 20 yrs and I myself had the ultimate edge: I was a smart, thoroughly disengaged student for most of my learning life. Basically, I was one of them and as such I knew exactly how to reach them.

 

That situation ended with me loving the job of teaching and signing up for more and more of it. Eventually that took me to ASU and from there to a local community college that was focused on the classroom more than it was the rhetoric of education—at least for a while.

 

The moment you start to talk about accreditation and completion goals and large-scale programs, you stop talking about good teaching. IMHO, good teaching is exactly like good coaching—you build a gameplan around the talent you have as opposed to trying to force everyone in the room to do something you’ve done for so long that it has become second nature.

 

I recognize the world isn’t black and white and you cannot completely engage in one thing or the other. The reality of education is that teachers are expected to have their feet in both worlds, and professors get full time roles because of the stuff they do outside of the classroom—the stuff that makes the college look good and gets you noticed—as opposed to anything they do inside the classroom. In my own job and interviewing experience, we will spend 45 minutes or more asking questions about who these people are as ‘educators’ and about 20 minutes watching them actually teach. Until recently, we did the teaching part without even having students in the room. What sort of false construct is that?

 

This semester I’ve stepped back entirely from the administrative side of the academic world. I’ve given up on presenting work at conferences, chasing academic publishing credits and innovation awards, and even looking for recognition within the college. I’ve drilled down my focus to what works best in the classroom and discovered that when I peel away the sticky glue residue that is everything that comes with the job of being a professor, the stuff beneath is raw energy that needs to be engaged and channeled. The human brain wants to learn and if we allow ourselves, each person standing up in front of that classroom has the engrained tools to engage it.

 

I am officially all in.

I realize I should’ve done this a lot sooner—like draft day when I had the chance to snag the Jets D, but due to a computer scrolling error never realized they were still on the board. Now I have the Big Blue D set to start for me tomorrow evening and I believe with all my heart that they will pay out. That means the Giants will too, as you will soon discover…

 

NYG over WAS
Consider who they’ve lost to and in what fashion. The Falcons are #10 on the power chart, and that game was NY’s to loose, which they did but I feel like composure is forming amongst this young and scattered D. The offense is coming together as well, especially following Preston Parker (5 drops—3 of which could’ve changed the outcome of a total of two games) being cut. Like Vereen said, “We just gotta finish”

CIN over BAL
Something is amiss in Ravens country. I cannot figure out what it is exactly, but I have a feeling it has to do with the secondary. I expect to see them picked apart Sunday Morning. Wait, I know what it is… No sizzle.

CAR over NO
I’m assuming that Brees does not play, but if he does the outcome might still be the same. I wonder what they were thinking when they let Graham walk.

CLE over OAK

I trust the CLE secondary to not let Cooper and co run wild all over them. I also believe in the power of Manziel to extend plays to the point where Benjamin can put up points.

ATL over DAL
NY tried to stop Julio and failed. DAL has even less of a chance here.

HOU over TB
This is the week to start the HOU D. They will come together and make an enormous impact on the rookie QB.

SD over MIN
NE over JAX
These two are gimmie games. Nuff said.

NYJ over Philly
Sanchez might get some work in. The way I saw the Jets hit Luck is the way they may hit Bradford, and that dude cannot take it. Make your waiver wire grab right now. Butt fumble and all…

PIT over STL
This is about the passing attack and the ability of the Steelers to stretch the field. Mostly though, it is about the return of Bell

IND over TEN
They cannot lose forever.

ARI over SF
BUF over MIA
Same issues here. Old rivals clashing with one team clearly emerging as a divisional contender and the other emerging as Just Another Franchise.

SEA over CHI

Bam Chancellor!!!!!!

DEN over DET

I don’t know how they keep winning but they do.

GB over KC
I DO know how they keep losing and we will see more of that on a high schoring and close Monday Night game.

 

Some Thoughts:

1. This will be posted late. I’m not internet adjacent at the moment and may not be for hours.

 

My youngest is throwing a fit in my bedroom. At one point he ‘Brogue kicked’ a pillow straight off my bed. Its a wonder he’s in there in the first place as he is completely unconscious and has been since he staggered in a half hour ago. He didn’t head straight to the bedroom. There were stops in the loft and library along the way. The entire time he was touring our home he was whining plaintively about how I was somehow being mean and not allowing him to go to sleep. Once he settled on my room he turned his attentions to being angry at whoever was the antagonist of his dream. That dude is still catching a butt kicking.

I’m not certain that this level of anger is at all healthy for the kid, but I remember sleepwalking as a kid. I remember being angry based on the way life was and the way I perceived myself being treated and wanting to lash out. If a pillow has to get ‘got’ then I’m willing to let that go. Besides, he is asleep. That part hasn’t gone totally overlooked for me. I think the whole episode is the result of a difficult run in we had at the end of the night when he, a tired little 6 yr old boy, asked to be carried to bed. I obliged and waited at the stairs for him to join me. He wandered off elsewhere to do, well, who knows what. Meanwhile another one of them franchise boys made the same request. I carried the child upstairs and let the little one know I’d be back in a moment and he became very upset at the idea.

He just woke up.

He looked at me, confused, and then went back to his room. I’ll check on him soon…

The thing about all of this is expectation. He expected me to wait and hold fast until he was ready to go. He didn’t think I was going to work with any other kid until he was ready because he already called dibs. Such a fine and bright theory, but impossible in practice.

As I wind down these ten minutes I feel like I need to go tuck him in again. A soft kiss and a few moments of back rubs should soothe the shuddering beast. If that doesn’t work there’s always hypnosis…

I’m pretty crossed up about fantasy football. My team is in a 2 QB league, which means I should have 3 to satisfy the Bye week. My 3rd was Robert Griffin the 3rd, who fell to an injury in preseason and lost his job on the other side. My other two QBs both were injured within hours of each other this sunday. Cutler is gone for at least 3 weeks and Romo is, well, pulling a Romo. We should see him and Dez make their triumphant return in two and a half months–right round the fantasy playoffs.

I’ll be toast by then.

There is a way of playing the game where you seek to destroy your opponent. The league I am in feels that way, because they’ve snapped up every possible QB, leaving me to hope for the backups to the two I lost. Given that other teams lost players this week (most notably Drew Brees), I don’t have a lot of chance to score two QBs without some crazy trading happening. I might just be done for the season… in week 2.

Some Thoughts:

1. This week has been interesting already in that I am really beginning to take stock of my responsibilities and make measured gains in reducing how much I have to do on a daily basis in order to make space for the things I already do that can be done with more car and depth.
2. I am also thinking about the lifespan of cars. Mine is well over 150K and I bought the little box in 2008. It feels like something that I need to think through/work on.
3. I’m happy. It is a good feeling. I used to be happy every day, and for a while I went dark, but I’m back to my old ways–in so far as happy I mean. My old old ways wouldn’t be smart life choices.
4. I’m more excited about the soccer season this year for my kids then I am about the football season. I think it is because I am more intimately involved in the soccer–I help coach and can work on making shirts and cool stuff like that whereas in football all of that is left to other people who may or may not get it done in a way and level that makes me gleeful. Still, I promised not to helicopter so there.

I feel like Dr. Frankenstein.

Some time ago I forged ahead with the idea to do as most American parents do and tell my kids the little white lies of Santa Claus, The Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny. This weekend we sat and watched We Bought a Zoo and during that film the dad has an interaction with his daughter where she overhears him say the Easter Bunny isn’t real. My eldest said, “What did he say about the Easter Bunny?”

My first born child is in middle school now and through the impossible magic that is storytelling I have managed to keep him believing these things are real. All three boys are believers. In fact last xmas Santa led them on a scavenger hunt to uncover their gifts ‘he’ has been doing this for two years now and they adore it. They look forward to Santa’s search nearly as much as they do the process of opening the gifts themselves.

The Bunny has no active role in our lives. He doesn’t hop over to our home delivering candies like he does for some others. The tooth fairy still delivers on her promise of cash for teeth. They were also recently introduced to the elf on the shelf and find the concept of that utterly believable.

My kids are not dumb or gullible. They figure out most things very quickly, but I have actively engaged in maintaining this myth of magical creatures for reasons I still don’t quite understand. I’m good at creating such fictions and better at locating media that supports and justifies the physics of such things. Still, it seems quite destructive to have kids believe in that stuff for so long.

Unfortunately, I don’t know how to pull the plug on the myths. I mean I could just tell the older one. He’s at that age where he should’ve already figured it out anyhow. However, the real question becomes why did it take so long and what have I been holding onto with these stories?

I just don’t know.