1370. The Culture of Evidence Based Fear

A recent NPR report by Tom Goldman spoke to the sometimes devastating injuries that can come from a kid playing youth sports. This article/newscast is one of many that speaks to the negative impact of youth sports on the body. Goldman writes that specializing in youth sports at an early age leads to back problems that can sideline the kids for months or even permanently. Goldman isn’t the first to show us the research-based statistics of how physical activity can hurt kids. This article on Brain Trauma is one in a forest of scholarly reports on the ills of tackle football. The articles seeks to raise awareness and, in some instances, warn parents off of sports like football and hockey. I get it. We want to keep our kids safe, but I also feel like we cannot keep them safe no matter what we try to do. There is always going to be some activity, or food, or weather condition, or airborne pathogen, or close contact situation, etc that poses a dramatic risk to us. This utter lack of safety is a fact of life, and the moment we cave to the fear is the moment we stop living to the fullest.

My neighborhood makes an old-school New Yorker like me laugh out loud. My small town Iowan wife is obsessed with locking the doors and windows at night in order to ensure that burglars won’t waltz into our house undetected. I support this mild level of paranoia, but from time to time I have to rib her by reminding her that we live in a neighborhood where everyone in a 3 mile radius has glass doors on the back of their houses and glass windows  without bars on the first floor. These same people tend to have 50-90 inch flat screen TVs only inches away from those glass doors and windows. If a burglar wanted to take advantage of a situation they’d have their pick of homes across the state of Arizona. Of course, some of those home owners might have guns, but so will a good crook, so we’re suddenly in a deadly shootout in the middle of suburban USA. Its a ridiculous speculatory leap, but no more ridiculous than the idea that we are absolutely made safe by turning a lock one direction or the other on a flimsy port of entry. In all aspects of life we are pushed towards action (or inaction) by fear. Because we are afraid, we seek to find a situation where we can create the illusion of safety.

At some point each of us have to accept that life is a one-way train ticket with risks of departure at every stop along the way. That shouldn’t stop us from taking the ride and enjoying all that life has to offer. There are warnings in the air about everything we do, but the warnings should be telling us how to be aware and to manage the risk as opposed to telling us to stop living all together. The cessation of life will come soon enough, but if you haven’t lived before it happened then losing life won’t even matter.

 

Some Thoughts:

  1. This past weekend I watched a few of my players beat themselves up and insult themselves. I’m still struggling to come to grips with this behavior. I feel like they are working so hard to please not only themselves but someone else. These are players who don’t necessarily have the physical skills to excel at the game of flag football the way my team plays it. These are exactly the kids I write about when I write about finding a way to get everyone involved and put them in a position to succeed. At first I thought maybe I was a part of the reason why they beat themselves up. Next I looked to my players who, like most kids, are harsh when a teammate isn’t living up to the high expectations they set for themselves. Finally, I looked at a combination of factors–including the parents. I still think it is my job to put them in a position to succeed, but if they don’t succeed I realize now that it is up to myself, the team, and the parents to make them feel like making the effort towards success is enough for us. After all, it is enough for me as their coach.
  2. WTF, Broncos? I mean, seriously?

1369. Reflections on a Superbowl Sunday

In these rare moments I find myself smiling about the crazy uncertainties of life. A few days ago I said in no uncertain terms that the Broncos were going to take the Superbowl. File that under things I thought I knew but actually had no idea. 43-8 is a shockingly different outcome from what I expected. Sadly (and strangely) there was a moment early on when they flashed on the Offensive Coordinator and he had this look on his face–the same look I had the other day in the game I was coaching and lost handily. Clearly we aren’t talking about the same stakes or the same level but we are talking about the same sense. In that instant that coach recognized that his players wouldn’t be able to do a single thing he wanted to do on offense, because the guys on the other side had that something special working for them and his guys absolutely did not. This feeling is akin to despair and is very tough to shake. In truth it can be a contagion as you saw it transfer through the entire offensive coaching staff and emboldened the defensive play calling. To paraphrase Coach Dennis Allen, They are who we thought they were.

Now comes the next steps. In a video game you hardly get the chance to celebrate before you are resigning restricted free agents and making flight plans for the annual rookie combine. Real life is starting to look like a video game thanks to the tons of media coverage that every aspect of the off season gets. Now is the hour of our discontent, if you are a Broncos family member. In this time of defeat and dejection, you now have to figure out how to hold on to the talent that got you this far. With Decker already announcing plans for free agency, holding on to the core people might be hard to do.