10 Minute Rule

It’s another beautiful day in paradise. I’m learning to lean into the idea of self-care as well as the idea of self reflection and growth through silence. It is an important thing to get a reset. I’m truly on that tip as of late.

Speaking of which, with another boy moving out there is an opportunity to turn that space into an office for the Lady Talis and I. She has graciously offered for me to take that space wholly as my own. A Talis-lair if you will. I might. I haven’t had my own space in a long time and this space feels like an opportunity to really make it my own in a way that honors the dudes who lived in it but also be really about me having something I feel like belongs to me myself. That is not to say she can’t use it or share or what have you. In truth, I’d want her input on design. I think it might be good for me to have a space like this to go to and truly sink into on my own.

It is an option. I’ll take time thinking through it.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Trump Media pulls back from side ventures after losses, offers fast access to the president’s posts for a fee” Can we all finally agree this man and his entire family are a set of classless grifters who’ve made it this far on the old belief that a certain type of person should be at the top. We’ve let them fail up for so damn long…
2. Also Ran: “Democratic Arizona Gov. Katie Hobbs chooses former Republican Mayor John Giles as her running mate“
3. Headed back home very soon. Home. That is a strange word for it. Lately it feels like another stop. Another destination where I lay my head. Here was home for three months and I loved it so much that I don’t want to be in the other space anymore. Not the culture. Not the people. Not the job even. I want to start my next chapter here with the Lady Talis. We can visit the other place…. when it isn’t so damn hot.

Building my classes for the semester, I realized that I may be taking on a lot this year. My Learning Community is not looking terribly strong right now, which means I may be taking on another composition course, which I would need to build. It would represent my fourth separate build of the semester. I’m not two weeks out from classes and have only fully completed 1 of a possible 4. Heck, even if the LC makes its still 1 of 4 as I haven’t finished that build out either.

We were afraid the LC would not make.

I was hoping this was going to be the kind of semester where I was fully ready day 1. Now it is turning into the same old miasma that it feels like it always is. More and more I am looking for a future where everything is locked in and I don’t need to worry about making and not making. I want to focus on providing really good, researched, and useful content that students carry forward with them. I want each week to feel like it means something and when you miss its, ‘dang, how did I miss that?!’ as opposed to ‘I missed a week… did I miss anything?’

The answer should always be yes.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Ben Jones, good ol’ boy ‘Dukes of Hazzard’ actor and 2-term US House member, dies at 84” So… Cooter was a sitting US Congressman for two terms before being redistricted out of office. There’s a lot to be thinking about here. A lot. This is how fame impacts politics… Rest in peace, Cooter.
2. Someone should do a study into the impact of ASMR on your mental well being…

Yesterday I witnessed my first drone show. It was entirely unexpected, coming on the heels of a David Foster and Friends concert featuring Ceelo Green (and son). The show was spectacular and featured flyovers by F/A-18 Hornets as well as the Snowbirds precision air team. It was possibly the best show I’ve been to–certainly the best outdoor show I’ve witnessed given all that it entailed. They even threw in a 20 minute fireworks show for good measure.

This is not a yearly event. I’ve been blessed with a ‘stumble into things’ type of lifestyle that has led me down the road to wonder. I think a large part of that is being open to wonder and open to adventure… and being fantastically lucky. In fact we’d seen the Snowbirds days earlier while walking to the beach… and pulling up on a huge show and perfect seating. I cannot explain these blessings except for to say I want to give others moments like this.

I also want to stay here and visit other places where community matters and people are like minded about giving back. If I had the level of wealth to do so, I would create that in the space I’m at for as long as I’m there.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Royal guests and stars dazzle as $14.5M raised at David Foster Foundation gala“

It’s all in the exhale.

Focus on the space. Think yourself through it. Pick a position just a few inches off the real and lock in on it. Then you clise your eyes and exhale. You’re there now with that whisk of air pushing out all around you for the briefest instant before the atmosphere replaces itself and you’re sucking that new space in. That’s how mom taught me to jump. It’s the best way I know. Not the only way. My dad tried to teach me a different version, but he’s not like us. Not yet. He’s Rookmen–another one of those stupid orders derivative of the Paladins who are basically angry about us having what they don’t. The Rookmen don’t pin their dislike on God or act like its a power that nobody should have. They’ve taken the shepherd’s approach to things.

Dad says jumping is less about focus than it is instinct. He likes to play this game he calls ‘Leapfrog’ In essence its catch, but the idea is that I go where he throws and bounce back to him with the ball. By the time I hit there’s another ball already in the air and I have to get that one, and so on. We’re up to three balls already. Mom hates the game. She refuses to play it. She says it will wear me out. He thinks that one day the Rookmen’s work will be at an end and we will be public news and that the only way things go well for us in a world like this is if there is some kind of sport attached to what we can do. I don’t know about any of it, but I do know I can jump more frequently than anyone I know, and I know a lot of Jumpers.

Some Thoughts:

1. Another freewrite which is a bit of fanfiction. I was thinking about Jumper and couldn’t stop… so I wrote.

“Sheeee-it” Poppa said. He never cursed like a normal person. He turned it into an event. This time the event had his hands high in the air like police where telling him what was what. He brought them down slow, waving off my proclamation as if I’d said the dumbest possible thing in the world.

“I’m serious, Poppa. I’m going to college.”

“And who is paying? You? That Costco job got you right like that and now you want to be Professor Alexander?”

“The job is going to help me cover my room and board. The rest is a scholarship.”

“Who gave you a scholarship? You ain’t even that good at math.”

I sighed. It wasn’t worth it getting mad at him. People are who they are, and Poppa is a man who believes in things being a particular way. “It isn’t for math.”

“Ain’t for ball neither. You can’t dribble, can’t catch, can’t do much of anything athletic with those big ass glasses on your face like that. You know you get that from your momma’s side don’t you?”

Anger died in me a long time ago. At 17 years old all I had left inside was exasperation.

Some Thoughts:

1. Did it. Wasn’t peak, but it is a start.

Tomorrow marks the return of the Friday Freewrite and I am not ready.

I don’t know how to be ready to do a freewrite. I guess I’ll pick some things out of a hat and see where the flow goes. I’ve been away from it for so long that it has me wondering if I can still freestyle. It’s like returning to the X-mas eve poem every December and hoping there is still something left in the rhyme bank. There always has been. I’m hoping the same holds true in the ten minutes I turn my mind and spirit loose on the page tomorrow. It’s been so worked up in my head that I was afraid to even try for fear of failure.

I’d gotten to the point where I wasn’t even writing unless it was for pay. That is no way to be a writer. This is a passion gig. You get paid if you’re good, but you’re good only when you feel what you’re putting out there. I’ve never been great for that very reason. There aren’t that many stories I’ve put out that I was 100% like this is my hottest write. I want to, one day, feel that about everything successive thing that leaves my brain and hits the page. I at least want to have energy behind what I put out. There is evidence that the energy comes from moments like freewriting where it isn’t about the cash, but is about the love of the game–so to speak.

So, tomorrow I write.

Today I think I’ll play a little more CFB.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Rubber ducks by the thousands splash into Chicago River for annual Special Olympics fundraiser” 90,000 ducks. Fundraiser or no, who’s gonna clean all that up?! I’m asking for a friend.
2. Geeked about the start of fall camp for the boys. Only a month till the games.
3. There’s a game on right now I think… Cardinals. Panthers. Pre-season.
4. Back to the writing… What is my next project? No idea. I’ve gotta let that marinate for a while still.

Tomorrow is the first preseason game of the season. Madden drops as well. I guess I can say it: Football is BACK!

My boys already started the pre-season and they are geeked for what is ahead. With Day 1 of training camp at UNI officially in the books I can say that #3 locked up. #5 is back there at safety so it isn’t about locking up so much. He’s getting his unit right. They’ll flash this season. He’s going to stick with Defense only, which is smart for a kid who is already hard committed to play college ball come January. The one already in college? He’s got things to prove to the world. He’s going to do just that this fall. I said it before: Age matters. With two years as a D1 starter under his belt he is finally 19 years old and hitting that growth spurt. He’s put on the weight and added speed doing it. This, coupled with wisdom and patience makes for a top CB.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Aaron Donald officially works out for Rams as potential comeback nears” Garret and Donald?! Poona out there too… with that secondary. Am I gonna have to pull up to a Rams game?!
2. Crazy thought: I might head into the semester without having to design a new lesson for every class every week! I might get my stuff right before the semester for the first time in like a decade or more… perhaps ever!

It is hard to fathom that I was at the X-mansion only yesterday. When I saw that I honestly thought I missed a day of blogging. I really did. Then I realized that we’ve done so much since that post that it feels like its been at least two days. Yet it is not. Today feels like it was a very long day. We stumbled upon a performance of the Canadian Snowbirds flight team simply by following the hordes of people to the edge of the city. This after a long morning of relaxation. Now it is evening and it feels like that morning was a day ago. I’m not used to feeling like my days are long in a good way.

Time is tricky. It tricks you into sinking in and it tricks you into bailing out. The minutes are the minutes but how we interpret such things can change based on a number of factors, but primarily based on how we feel about where our feet are at. My feet are in a good space and I love being here. It isn’t going to last. We’ll return, but we’ll be leaving sooner than later. There are classes to be taken and taught.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Capybaras keep their chill while crashing Brazilian legislature” They actually pulled up!
2. Also this: “New York school pauses plan to deploy humanlike AI robot teacher after backlash” They make sex bots by the way… It’s clear once you see the ‘teacher’

I’ve long been a person obsessed with place. I want a place that is both beautiful and compelling to be my ‘forever home’ and unfortunately I live in a desert for 9 months out of the year, so no. Presently I am at the X-Mansion and writing out this blog. That, my dear readers, is a fantastic location. Set aside the interior (which I have yet to visit in all of these years of visits) the wooded walk here and the exterior make me feel wonderful. I believe writing is about feeling and about comfort. You have to be in the right state of mind to build out these amazing worlds and to tell stories that move people. I love places like this because they get me going. They trigger the imagination–the what if?

I also love crowded spaces because they close me deeper into myself yet, at the same time, give me an out if I want to look around and see the world. When I’m in an office that out is my phone. This is never as useful or productive as watching real people. It is in fact quite distracting and detrimental and… hard to turn off.

Anyway, I’m just going on now. How about…

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Trump says new talks are Iran’s ‘last chance’ to make a deal” Or what? Like seriously? Are we gonna Nuke them? Are we bringing in ground troops? They are really messing with the dude’s head.
2. The upside of the Hulk appearance is that he actually got HULK big. Been a while. Wondering where we’re going with all of that…

I remember little of the actual film but more of how the idea hit me. I am a Brokedown Palace at the moment. I am the thing once great (if only in his own mind) and now reduced to a painful foot and back situation brought about by hours of walking. I don’t know that the shoes are necessarily the issue, or the thing still keeping me going. I do know that I’ve walked over 600 miles this summer if not closer to 800. I don’t believe I will reach the thousand in the next two weeks. That would mean stepping up my game to a point my body appears unable to sustain.

Broke down.

Broken down. Breaking down. Down and out. But not out–not yet. In the mornings my ankles ache when I stand. When I sit too long the soreness blossoms in my left foot beneath the pad. I’m trying to get right. It isn’t going to be a painless process.

Some Thoughts:

1. Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Fires in Spokane, Washington, burn 600 structures, force 60,000 evacuations” Is Arizona next?