Day: December 2, 2012

Deep down inside everyone knows that sports are a distraction. They are a way for us to step outside of our lives and and real-world allegiances and to dive into something that is a ‘safe’ gamble. We put a whole lot into these seemingly meaningless matches. In truth we give them meaning. We invest our love and attention in whether or not one team moves the ball across a line more than the other team and in that way our ‘side’ wins. But why? I think we do it because humans are competitive by nature. We, men especially, have little patience for non-zero sum competition.  Someone must lose in order for us to feel superior, and in order to feel superior we must feel smart or privileged enough to align ourselves with the winning side. That is why sports are important and it is important that we continue to watch them.

Here is why they are not. We have equated hero status to athletes, pushing aside the scientists, businessmen, and professors that actually advance our species towards expansion or actualization. Maybe it is a function of a species that doesn’t have a future plan past, perhaps, 100 years.

Some Thoughts:

1. I am still debating moving the talislegger site whole hog over to wordpress. The problem is, I don’t do anything with the site itself. Ostensibly, Talislegger is supposed to be my website for writing and promoting a certain me-ness. Still, I don’t know what or how I want to do with the website behind 10 minute gasps of coherence.
2. I need to improve the attitude I bring to the table when helping the kids with homework. It isn’t fun for them or me, but I cannot show that. If I show my displeasure I will turn them off.
3. Still wandering through the darkness trying to find my way back to that place of zen. Once upon a time there was a place in my mind where ideas and actions flowed freely. That is more of a memory than anything else now. It happens to the best of us from time to time. It is a form of writer’s block. I think the proper term is ‘overthinking’.
4. Watching the Jets I wonder if they even practice. Seriously, the offensive blackout they are currently under is shocking. I blame Sanchez, but it isn’t all on him. A lot is.

Lets go ahead and call yesterday an aberration. It had everything to do with the cat lounging behind me and licking my hair. Something about being groomed puts me immediately to sleep. I may require therapy in the future. In the present I find myself muddling through weekends alone. My wifey is doing night shifts to finish up her nursing practicum, leaving me with three little boys who absolutely think that sleep is some form of evil.

By the time they’ve been put down I am too exhausted to really focus on anything of worth. This is problematic, because I am hip deep in work and needing to get all that done in a matter of days. Can I do it? Of course, but there will be a price. Sleep mostly. I was talking with a professor friend of mine and in a truly honest moment about writing he said, “We make myths of ourselves.” He was talking about how writers and writing teachers say you need to work for hours at the craft each day, creeping towards Malcolm Gladwell’s idea of mastery. In fact we writers tend to lounge around a lot, and on the eve of a deadline we right like possessed things until finally a draft arrives, still hot from the printer.

My life is like that. My drafts are like that, and though I would love to see them be the other way–the fantasy world writer’s way–I doubt that is forthcoming. The key to that life tends to be writing as a full time professional. I mean, I can only play so much Mass Effect 3 before gaming itself gets to be a bore. That is when I grab hold of the keyboard to unfurl my creativity.

No, I’m not going to do that right now. I’m going to check on the kids and then play Mass Effect 3.