Not much more to say today than yesterday. I remain at odds with what makes me happy and what is good for my life moving forward. I don’t know that there is room in my life for everything I want and days like this only serve to highlight that. Effectively, I need to have less going on. In fact, I need to have nothing going on most days in order to leave room for whatever we decide to do. If everything is so scheduled–especially through the weekends, it does not allow for me to be spontaneous. It is that lack for freedom; of spontaneity that is ruining what I have tried to build into my relationship.
So, I am firmly attached to the idea of this being the end of an era. However, it grows more difficult to truly enjoy the end of it, because that enjoyment comes at a clear cost.
Okay, no more life talk. Not for a while on the blog.