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Its been said before, but when people ask you ‘how are you feeling?’ I don’t think they really want an answer. They’re looking for platitudes. I’m fine. I’m doing well, and you? But if you step outside of the realm of acceptable answer to this social formality, the formality aspect of it begins to emerge more clearly.

 

“How are you?”

“I’m at peace with the universe.”

“Huh?”

 

“How are you?”

“I’m contemplating suicide.”

“Ummm… What?”

 

“How are you?”

“After that rape last night? Great!”

“…”

 

While these represent extreme cases, even the mildest of deviation can trigger confusion, as though both parties were reading from a script and someone screwed it up.

 

“How are you?”

“I’m straight up frisky.”

“Wait, what?”

 

“How are you?”

“I’m like a two today.”

“Wow, that’s too bad. Well, bye!” (avoids eye contact and scurries off)

 

As in the latter case, an indication that the asked party is not doing well can create social tension. Odds are you don’t neccesarily want to talk to a person and even moreso don’t want to be the shoulder to be cried on or ear to be lent. However, once the bad news is proffered one can’t help but feel trapped in what is likely to be a lengthy and emotional conversation. It is as if the social contract was not recognized as a mere formality and nicety but instead a genuine invitation to air one’s grievances against the world.

 

This, therefore, is the problem with how are you.

We need a new form of greeting that shows a clear dividing line between creating small talk and social niceness and actually wanting the answer to a question. Some of this division is mitigated by tone and body language. If someone asks you how you are and then say, turns away from you and walks into their office, they clearly couldn’t care less about how you really are. If they appear to be listening intently, they might be really good about the social cues and structures or they might actually care. It is hard to tell. I suggest a change of language. Perhaps say something along the line of, ‘how are things going in your life right now?’ Give that strong indicator that a genuine response is welcome.

 

Thus ends my lesson for the day.

 

It turns out I cannot get anything done at home.

Nothing.

Nada.

Maybe the blog, but little else. There are far too many distractions here. Most come in the form of video games and delectable TV shows, but some arrive in the form of chores and unfinished projects. There isn’t a single room I can lock myself into without trying to paint it or watch a TV in it or just straight slack off. I cannot find a way past this problem as of yet and have, as a result, been writing off site. It works much better that way.

Some Thoughts:

1. I still don’t get why Iowa matters so dang much to the Caucus system. There are 3.1 million Iowans. There are 318 million Americans. That’s literally the 1%. We are leaving the opening roll call of the 2016 presidential race to the 1%. That is just dumb.
2. I watched my dog pee on the rug. He sucks.
3. I am proud of the incredible work my students did on the Tunnel of Oppression.
4. Republicans are seriously complaining about ‘gotcha’ questions and the room being too hot? Seriously? Seeing a legitimate field of GOP candidates reminds me that there isn’t a legitimate field of GOP candidates.

I’m up early and writing in honor of NanoWrimo and in anticipation of a busy day where I need to get to the words early and often, knowing I won’t have a lot of time later. I want to start by talking about the debacle of the NY teams. Everybody lost. I say this not even knowing if the Knicks played but assuming if they did they lost. Well, not everyone lost. Buffalo beat the Islanders, but in that situation someone had to win. More importantly, the Jets were handled by what most assumed to be an inferior Raiders team. The Giants got jobbed by the refs at the end of the game, leading to a 50 yd field goal to cap a 13 TD contest. I mean, wow. Oh, and don’t get me started about the Mets.

I’m not going to spend the entire ten talking sports. That’ll get me angry and have the wrong effect on my psyche. Today and tomorrow is the event I spent yesterday’s post complaining about. I past the complaints and the disappointment and in that very me mode of trying to make the lemonade out of whatever lemons might be laying around. In truth I think things are going to wind up going well. What the students lack in props and polish they more than make up for in intensity and scene preparedness.

Now in terms of local earth news, I experienced my first earthquake last night. Some reports say 4.1 while others say 5.2. I say what the heck? Earthquakes were never supposed to be a situation in AZ. Yet here we are. This situation, like this series of blogs, is to be continued.

 

Recently I prepped my class for a tunnel of oppression project. I was under the impression that I’d hipped them to the gravity of the situation and the level of effort required to create the tunnel environment. Now of the two groups/skits my class was responsible for, neither seemed prepared for setup at the level that was expected. We walked into our area and saw two other skits looking outstanding and clearly felt overmatched. So, why? I think that a part of that is my responsibility. Its like the coach who gets fired because his team loses a bunch of games. The losses are his fault to an extent–for not making the most out of what s/he had and not preparing his/her players. I feel that as a youth coach and feel it as a teacher especially when the students aren’t properly prepped for the task.

So, why weren’t they ready? For starters, its a developmental class competing with on ors and 200 level courses. Most of the kids I have are first semester college students and are trying on college for size. This reads like an excuse, but I mean it to sound like a condition. Having diagnosed that condition I am responsible for simplifying the tasks to an extent and providing strong enough instructions and time on task to get the work done. I feel like I could have done better with instructions (story of my life) but I also feel like the instructions really become boundaries to creativity to a certain extent. The students formed cogent ideas and executed scripts that felt both realistic and powerful. They just didn’t look as polished and professional as I wanted.

In the end I will learn from the event and I will become a better and stronger and more organized instructor as a result. I’m glad we are doing the tunnel, and I truly hope it comes off well.

The thing about holidays is that once they happen it is like a huge release of pressure. Everything that has built up towards making the holiday great diffuses in a sudden rush of activity. The front end of it is always the hardest. In our case, my boys and I were prepping for the Halloween candy walk right up until the point where we walked out the door. They stressed me out with costume failures and disagreements. Then we left and all was greatness.

I must say that I always wind up having a wonderful time with my boys. I found myself linking this to the cycle of professional wrestling in a way. We end an event and spend the next few weeks building the hype and storyline for the next event. I our case the next event is team parties and Thanksgiving. The latter isn’t really an exciting event, but maybe it is time to start some new traditions and raise the excitement of November’s big day.

Some Thoughts:

1. Mental illness is a serious issue. I wonder why and how we continue to allow the mentally ill the same freedoms–such as freedom to purchase guns–that we allow those who are not sick.

It amazes me still how much my life revolves around youth sports. You’d think I was training future professional athletes. I’m certain that many parents think they are. I see it in every team I coach or watch my kids play for. There is always the kid who is being groomed for The Next Level (TM). At what point does the grooming start too young? 4-5? 6-7? I still believe 10-12 is too young to start looking at you kid as the next (insert mad paid athlete here). Hell, these kids don’t know what they want to be. We as parents try to persuade them all the time, but they ultimately have to figure it out without us.

 

Some Thoughts:

1. I never really threw parties when I was married. Post-marriage I’ve been thinking about the whys and the hows of such things, starting with how do you throw a Halloween eve party for the neighbors and make it worth their while? I think the result was solid fun and gave me the impetus to do more.

I’ve come to think of Halloween as a series of near disasters. This is largely due to the fact that I’m forty now and, for the first time in lord knows how long, I’m going to be wearing a costume. The costume is not the same costume I intended to be wearing as of last night. I wasn’t able to find the ultra-col looking jacket to turn me into this:

Surprisingly enough, I’d made or knew how to create every other element of that look. I wasn’t about to resort to tight pants (read: 40 yr old man), but the rest was set up fairly authentically. I even bought the super cool mask from a designer who frequents comic conventions.

Once the jacket was decidedly impossible, I changed gears and decided to build something around another purchase from a comic book convention:

I purchased a bunch of ultra sabers for myself and the franchise boys (none of which are the one in this ‘appropriated’ image). My frost blue saber is both very cool and lends itself well to a jedi costume. So, thats the new plan: Make a jedi/sith costume.

This whole plan boils down to the robe. Amazon offers nice one’s, but none can get here in time. I’m forced to take my chances and one of these temporary ‘Spirit’ Halloween stores, which advertise having every imaginable costume accessory–so long as you have the cash.

I don’t, but I did do quite a bit of the groundwork for the costume at goodwill and savers. I knew I could make it because I am making two Sith uniforms for two of my three boys, the third preferring to wear a bright blue bodysuit and nothing else.

I’ll keep the blog updated on how things go, but I am feeling good about this change of look. The Red Hood will happen, but not right now.

It is good to have the wire back in play. Not as good to be the guy who is in 3rd in one league (5-2) and 9th in the other (1-6). The problem stems from QB play and a really rough start in both leagues. While the 5-2 team is on track and leading in points most every week, the 1-6 team continues to struggle to crack 90 pts while having scores nearly twice that posted against us week to week. The league has, as one southern associate is fond of saying, ‘stomped a mud hole in my chest and walked it dry.’

This is not the end. I have a (very) outside chance of making the playoffs and have been making moves all week to shore up a shaky team. Presently there are 6 qbs on the roster and I start two. The others have been keeping me alive the past few weeks while I wait for the real starters (including Romo) to heal and play. This is what I get for starting a Cowboy. Lesson learned. Next season will be different.

This week offers a thin slate of NFL games, 14 in all. The results shall be as follows:

MIA over NE
This team is on fire and the Campbell-lead bunch will burn out their engines beating the Patriots this one time. Why? Because Bill B. doesn’t know what they are gonna do. If you don’t know, you cannot scheme.

DET over KC
The Chiefs are a shell of themselves without their lead RB

ATL over TB
Battle of the #1 receivers here and won, handily, by Julio Jones.

SD over BAL
Another QB dream. I wish I could play Woodhead this week…

MIN over CHI
AP all day.

AZ over CLE
The Browns are slipping back into mediocrity.

TEN over Hou
I am starting Dexter McCluster out of necessity, and I think that move is going to pay out this week.

NYG over NO
Giants are back and looking to take their energy and grit to the dome…

CIN over PIT
CIN might not go undefeated this season, but they won’t lose this week.

STL over SF
I cannot figure out who SF is trying to be. You know what I think? Neither can they…

NYJ over OAK
Jets need a win here and they’ll get one. Amari Cooper will get the Revis treatment and there isn’t anyone else left to carry the catching load.

SEA over DAL
Sorry Cassel, no chance here.

GB over DEN
In the first serious battle of unbeatens, the GB D proves to be the difference with a shaky Manning under center.

CAR over IND
Superman is definitely in the building these days.

 

On the eve of nanowrimo I’ve been thinking quite a bit about the obstacles to writing well. The main obstacle is the inability to write often–meaning finding time to write, etc. State of mind is also a huge issue, which has been my issue tonight. I spent most of the night with a throbbing headache and a thundering inability to get in the right headspace. I’m barely in the headspace to talk football, which is the easiest of all subjects to write about.

I won’t make platitudes here or talk about the multitude of ways in which I can change. I’ll jus admit that change is needed in order to be successful at generating a nanowrimo-sized word count.

Definitely have to have better sittings than this one.

 

Some Thoughts:

1. The free writes are fictional. Just saying…

I’ve had a rough go of the last few days. I am trying to get into the writing life routine that I so dramatically fell out of. I am trying to do so before the nanowrimo saga begins. The result is some tough writing days, especially in regards to to a handful of projects I am trying to clean off the docket.

I think the issue with the writing life for me is maintaining focus. With so many distractions in daily life it is difficult to stay on task for a long period of time. The build up and cool down is also an issue. If I want to write for any amount of time I need to spend an hour clearing my head and another after cooling down. The cool down usually comes with a wealth of critical analysis of what I wrote and how I wrote it. That part is useful.

Finding the time to do all this is hard.