Day: July 25, 2014

I had occasion for several deep reflective moments between last night and today. We were all spread across the balcony looking at the mountains and wondering how to spend the next few days. The kids are convinced I should get a 3ds and join them in all of their crazy gaming. I’m convinced I need to work out a realistic set of gaming hours (Post run and read in the mornings and 4-7:30 in the evenings). I don’t do a very good job about being assertive about the time I spend. I allow myself to drift and shave away at the necessary time of things.

There is a proportional relationship between the amount of hours a person spends on any given task/situation and how good they are at such things. This goes beyond the 10,000 hours of Gladwellian fame to expand to our relationships, our self-awareness, etc. If I allow myself the time to do the things that are important then I will improve myself in the areas/things that I find important. I’m not interested in debating the mastery formula. I am a true believer in the concept of time on task = improved understanding. I also believe that successful people find the will to actually work through that time and put in the hours.

If I am to be the person I mean to be in life, I have to be an example of someone who puts his effort where his words shine.

Some Thoughts:

1. I really need to teach my kids how to fight. Not that ‘I won’t move or hit back’ karate stuff they teach kids these days, but real bare knuckles, ‘if someone comes at you this is what you do’ fighting. It hasn’t been an issue yet, but there is going to come a time when one of my boys is facing down a kid who wants at them.
2. We didn’t have the net yesterday. Times like this I write on the computer and wait to post…
3. Tomorrow I hope to find a moment to sit in the very spot I sat 15 yrs ago and recognized I was serious about writing.

**Note** I didn’t have the ‘net yesterday (a condition to be explained in 1539) so this is a late posting…

 

I’ve engaged in many discussions as of late about wants and needs. At this stage of my life the needs are primarily centered around family. At most, a roof, a laptop, intimacy, and good conversation are enough to meet my requirements for a very happy life. However, what I want often outpaces what I need. Thanks to Maslow, I recognize that once my basic needs are met, my wants take over and drive my motivations.

Every happy person I’ve asked tells me the secret is to have a reason to keep going. Some people find reason in making more money. Others find family to be the end all. For most of the world it isn’t that black and white. What we have here in my orbit is what I call ‘first world problems’. In other words, for most of the world the idea of struggling to find something to want is as bizarre as watching an alien disembark from a starship only to do an Irish jig before quickly reboarding.

You only struggle to want when you have enough to be happy. I’m far removed from rich people problems (and in a galaxy far far away from rich). The well-documented problem I’ve experienced over the past few years is this cult of satisfaction. I aimed for a particular goal, hit it, and then got fat and lazy on the limited success.  The way out of that of course, was to want more—out of myself, out of those around me, out of life itself. So, what is it that I want?

I want to be a best selling author. I want to tell stories that people want to hear and to use whatever wealth comes of that to open a bookstore that perpetuates the idea of storytelling to the next generation. I want to have deep philosophical conversations every night. I want to grow spiritually. I want to stop wanting to look like someone in shape and be someone in shape.  I want to know what it feels like once again to say that I want something and have the mental fortitude to set myself towards getting it. I want to know again that I can do whatever I say I mean to do.

Wanting is that first step. We all need to want something in order to find a way to better ourselves, so I ask you: What do you want?