Day: March 28, 2021

So, I had a bad day. It was a no good, terrible, filthy, stinking, piss poor whopper of a day. It was entirely my fault. I made things worse, and I handled all of it very badly. So, now what? So now I rebound. I have to.

I am sore from starting workouts with my youngest boy, which offers a small sliver of light into what is possible. I am in need of a drastic improvement in life condition, because how things are going now are cyclically bad and hurting everyone around me. What sucks even more is that I am not doing the best with mentally rebounding from the troubles I am dealing with. It feels like I am on the verge of a success and here we are feeling like all of it is smoke that I need to hold on to but can’t. So, what now?

I rebound. I dig in further. I write things down. I publish a schedule that lets everyone in my world understand what I have going right and wrong and how I am correcting for slippage.

A Calendar is an effective tool. I used to be able to use such things effectively, but that slippage I mentioned is getting progressively worse. I need to order the chaos.

Rough day. Expensive day.

I suffered a flat tire and discovered I needed to change out all four and had a number of other small but expensive mishaps throughout the day. I did manage to find a few moments of joy watching my kid play sports, but the day overall sucked. There was no real happy ending. It just seems to keep going and heading in a downward arc–the very antithesis of the stock market and more like the trajectory of human existence.

So, I am in a dark mood.

The laptop is damaged–likely beyond repair. This is the second laptop that went bad for me and this is the one I really liked. I don’t know that I will get a 3rd. I hope. however, I find it to be highly unlikely. So, highs and lows of the day:

High: I started a new audiobook and got a ton of good listening down. It has me thinking about new ways to approach my novel and I am excited to see what comes of it all.

Low: The aforementioned (or more hinted at) incident where I destroyed a prized knapsack, a football helmet, my $200 headphones, and the laptop. This led to a series of bad conversations and emotional let downs which made this day infinitely worse. Top 10 lows on the year for me.

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