The last few days have been tumultuous to say the least. I firmly believe in the adage ‘accept the things you cannot change’ though it is tough to create that in the moment and harder still to follow through by staying true to the letting go/acceptance. Maybe I ought to break that down a little further. Acceptance and letting go are not the same thing, they are beginning to feel like stages… as in stages of grief. I’m handling the growing up of the last kid quite badly. This is in no small part to the terrible parenting choices on both sides of the fence that led to a real sense of the kid leaning into realizing he has no actual enforceable parentage. This is what happens when the parent you primarily live with would rather baby you and be your fan. It doesn’t make for strong roots when the kid is led down a path as such. College year one is going to be filled with harsh realities. I hope I’ve prepared him to survive them.
But enough about him. The other big hiccup in my reality is the part of me being a writer and deciding what that means and how that looks in the immediate future. I’ve put a lot on hold as of late in that respect. I’ve been playing catch-up with the workload and not taking any initiative on my own as a writer. It needs to change. I need to develop a real schedule that is more than me playing around and really locked in on being serious about my craft. Not only a writing schedule but a reading one as well. I need to read more and better stuff. It needs to start now.
Some Thoughts:
- The WPM conversations are only helpful in the sense of deciding how many hours to allocate a day. So, I need to start there.