You can tell I was in a place of exhaustion yesterday, because I honestly thought it was Sunday night. Imagine my surprise to wake up on a Tuesday. This is how it has been over the past few weeks. I get tired, rundown, and then I keep going. Eventually it catches up with me and I say something pithy like, ‘I’ll sleep when i’m dead’ casually aware of how I am hastening that very event horizon. The facts: now is a lot to deal with and I am starting to crack again under the pressure.
I have a lot going on. There is too much to list here, but compounding work and emotional drama is the longstanding financial reconstruction of my life, which is not going according to plan. Not much is at this juncture and I feel a little out of control. I am struggling to find that one moment’s peace where I can just regroup and start knocking stuff off the list.
There is a very long list. It is incomplete but it is far superior to no list at all. Of course the sheer weight of the thing is enough to keep me sedentary, which it has. As a result everything is slowed and heavier and less able to get done. This tired saps the fight out of me big time, and already being emotionally bereft ain’t helping.