Day: December 4, 2019

Well, I got crushed in the money league. The problem there was fairly straight forward–I drafted PPR in a non-PPR league. In spite of that I was able to win a number of games, but that number was far too low to make the playoffs and I feel like I would have had little to no success in those playoffs anyhow. I won games, but I rarely cracked 100 points. The top teams always cracked 100 points. So, that is a wash. Meanwhile, the other league is gearing up for the playoffs. I have 2nd place right now and I feel pretty secure in that spot. This gives me the safest path to the ‘ship in my opinion, because some of these lower ranked teams have been catching fire late in the season. So, I’m saying there’s a chance.

Now it comes to deciding who to start.

I am not going to go with Danny Drops. He has fumbled the ball in every single start of his professional career. This is a thing he can work on, but if he doesn’t get a sixth sense of where the blitzer is, he is not long for this league. Honestly, I think he holds on to the ball too long. That won’t do for the NFL or the Fantasy Football League. Besides, he’s in a walking boot after the latest rash of hits, and Eli is starting again. Dude is not gonna make my cut. Instead I will bolster my roster with some late season sleepers to use just in case.

High on that list is finding a late season running back. There have been recent coach firings and offensive stall outs. James White is suddenly very relevant, and it could be that the panthers lean on their RB a little less, so I am curious on how to proceed here. I do have some thoughts on who has their foot in the W column this week…

CHI over DAL
TB over IND
MIA over NYJ
NO over SF
DET over MIN
HOU over DEN
GB over WAS
CLE over CIN
BAL over BUF
ATL over CAR (see: coaching change)
JAX over LAC
NE over KC
AZ over PIT
SEA over LAR
NY over PHI

I get a lot of what I write from real life. While I tend to write fantasy and science fiction, the conflicts are very real and either reflective of what I am going through, have gone through, or see going on. I think that is the beauty of writing about other worlds than these. It provides me the psychological detachment needed to calmly assess behaviors that I otherwise would be too close to in order to understand.

One that keeps on rearing its ugly head is this perception of perfection or rightness. I feel that all of us feel like we are right about most things. It is very difficult to know you are wrong about something and still do it or believe in it or act that way. Of course arguments always arise when such behaviors clash. Misunderstandings spiral, feelings are hurt, and that raises old fears and even older aggressions. For example, I’m practically trembling with stress right now because of a totally avoidable conflict. I, feeling like I was being completely devalued and treated in a no-nothing demeaning way, responded by puffing out my chest. This led to mistakes, confusion, and hurt feelings. I know that I was not being devalued or mistreated in any way, but instead the person in the conflict was nervous and unsure and trying to understand the situation and trying very hard to communicate with a person she probably saw as non-responsive (which I was–once I am mad I shut down and just do the work). This could have been easily de-escalated, but it wasn’t. In fact with every breath I made the problem worse, and this too is sometimes what I do.

Here is where the writing comes in: I have the ability in fiction to analyze the situation from every angle–to see where everyone made mistakes and to understand that everyone made mistakes. In real life nobody is willing to admit that both sides are generally at fault in misunderstandings, but from the detached 3rd person we can see these scenarios unfold, and perhaps that will help the next person in the situation to see what is going on in their own lives and recognize the mistakes they make.

It is a lofty goal, but it works for me. It makes me want to tell the story.