Big writing day. Big.
I’ve been pretty terrible at the game over the last two weeks, failing to do my exercises and daily word count outside of the blog for twelve of the last fourteen days. This qualifies as a tailspin–and not the cute Disney version. I don’t really know how I get sucked off track. It is a combination of factors often starting with the home life or some emotional issue in my life. Once I get off, it is tough to get right. I need to get right today, because there are due dates. One is even today, but I need to get it all back on track before Monday rolls around. Too much to do. Meanwhile, the Lady Talis is taking on more, which means I need to take on more in order to help keep this house straight. All of it feels like a great deal of piling on in the midsts of recognizing that I am not getting paid nearly enough for any of it.
The solution: Put my head down and get the work done. That’s really the only viable option ever in these circumstances. I need to do things to get my students on track, I need to do things to get my life on track, and I need to do things to get my future on track. That doesn’t leave any time beyond these ten minutes for complaining about what is wrong or what might be bothering me. At least the sleep situation is starting to level out. I’m not cured or better or anything, but I am getting more than 3 hours. That’s an improvement and a half. Hopefully the uptick in physical wellness will translate to some level of success in the other areas of my life.
I don’t feel like I am alone in these moments. It feels like everyone goes through slides. Those slides may turn into spirals and the spirals can continue until your life is completely upended. I don’t want it to wind up there, which is why I have to draw the line right here. I have to accept the conditions of my life as they are, dig in, and do the hard work. The only way out of the mess is to get through it.
Some Thoughts:
- Even my hands are refusing to type right. Not a good start to be flat out missing the proper keys… or keys at all on some attempts.
- No, there is not alcohol involved. Not yet