Roleplay writing and I are going through a bad moment. I feel as if I’ve lost the thread as of late. Nothing feels original or interesting in the writing and the stories I am putting out feel flat. Even the novel, which I enjoyed, echoes of other things. It is entirely character driven and lacks some of that “this is the world!” type flare that the books which inspired me have brought to the table. At least the writing is decent (IMHO).
That brings me to a deeper understanding and a deeper question. I understand that this is not enough for me right now. I question what is and where to go from here. I’ve started looking into another RP property, which I think could be a ton of fun to develop. It brings me joy to develop new things the way I was able to develop Voltron. I want to do that, but that is not all I want to do. I look at my fantasy world everyday and remark on the fact that I am not doing anything with that world. I could be. Heck, I may even be able to find a grad class to couch the work in. I cannot register until Halloween, so that question needs to wait in order to be answered. What does not have to wait is my choice to pursue something new and interesting. I need to work on the Justice Engine. Chapter 2 is calling.
But why isn’t that project screaming at me? Why am I not rushing to the laptop to do the work? It isn’t about being lazy. I want to write. In listening to the Dark Tower series I followed King’s winding mental pathway towards the resistance to complete that series, and I feel echoes of some of that in me. I don’t know if real life is getting in the way or I am continuing to use that as an excuse. Part of it is not fully knowing the characters, but again, excuses.
I suppose I ought to just get into it. Justice Engine and all.