I can always tell when my hearts not into a project or I’ve lost the thread or I think it’s going to turn out badly, because I’ll do anything to avoid sitting down and getting it done. It kills my sleep schedule too. I’ll stay up all night not thinking about it, but thinking about it. I’ll task my subconscious to run background processes, analyzing the project from every angle and hoping to find one that actually makes me feel like its both worth doing and could wind up not being trash. Needless to say, the last few days have been a study in sleep deprivation. I become my own worst critic/my own worst enemy when a project isn’t feeling the way it should. The last time it felt this epically bad I was working on a project for a particular Center at Arizona State University. That project made it to play testing and was never heard from again. I never heard from them again either. So, I can assume it was shuffled to the bottom of their pile and better written work became their focus.
That’s the thing with stinkers. I feel like I can smell them coming. This one smells pretty awful on all levels, and it is also quite late, so that is double trouble on my mind. Some of this is certainly compiling with the feeling of being overwhelmed. How could it not be? Of course, I do what I always tend to do when I know it isn’t going to end well–I run. I hide. I find anything and everything else to do. I cut my hair. I sweep the floors. I consider larger house renovation projects.
Anything but write.
Some Thoughts:
- Bonkers news quote of the day: Trump threatens Canada with 100% tariffs over its new trade deal with China. Ain’t nothing gonna happen. Dude’s been exposed as a bully over and over in the last few days and Carney doesn’t flinch.
- And because it can’t be Trump all the time (though he’d like that very much): Almost 10,000 flights canceled as major winter storm bears down across much of the US. I swear I saw this movie decades ago…
