I tried this 90-day journal, and man what a failure that was. I cannot even tell you when I began the journal other than to say it was within the last two or three weeks. Four maybe? See, that right there tells you what you need to know. I still have it. The “plan” is laid out with a list of things I ought to be getting done. It also is not being used in any way shape or form other than to take up space on my desk. Oh, and as a dust collector. I have a lot of those. It wasn’t until this mornign that I shoved it into a drawer, shuttering my futile hopes that I’d foiund some new and innovative way to not suck at getting things done in an orderly fashion. I bought two journals, actually. The second wouldn’t fit int he drawer, so I’m waiting until post-blog to put this one away. I might, actually, be clinging to a little bit of denial with this one too. I know I won’t even open the box it came in.
I keep trying to figure out how to prime the engine. I know that once I get going I do a fairly good job of staying motivated and productive through the end of a project, which leads to another short out and restart. I’m like that car your dad was fixing all those years but never actually ran for more than a few minutes at a time.
But when it ran…
This should not be happening with my life logically more than half over. I should be shifting into retirement mode and not worrying about having to be ramping up production. However, I do not live that kind of life and, as a result, am going to have to work even harder over the next ten or more years to even get to a place where I can cruise out the rest. Mistakes were made, but damn were they fun ones.
None of this addresses the fact that I cannot seem to get it going. It is harder and harder these days, and I have no one to blame but myself and y own tendency towards distractions and escape… Kind of like how I’m about to escape these last ten minutes.
Some Thoughts:
- Absolutely Bonkers Headline of the Day: “All 5 fundamental units of life’s genetic code were just discovered in an asteroid sample” Still want to cling to the theory that aliens don’t exist?