Krampus time in the Talislegger household. December 20th was officially Krampusnacht, because it is the day the children are released from school and marks that last fleeting hours they’ll act right. By the 21st they are wired, stuffed with candy, bereft of scheduled activities, and generally a pain in the ass. The transition from being my children to becoming wildlings in the George R.R. Martin tradition is rather swift. By 10 AM the littlest ‘legger was actually begging for me to take a swing at him. He figured if I started wrestling with him the others would jump me and they’d make a game of it.
I didn’t take the bait.
I am the kind of parent who wrestles and plays with his kids. I’m also a lot older than them and wear out faster–especially since I’ve had less than 24 hrs of actual alone-time vacation (which, it turns out, is all I’m going to get before I go back to work on the 3rd). I was tired, cranky and not about to put up with a trio of bored kids looking to stab buttons until something horrible happens. I separated for as long as I could and then I took them to see Frozen. The film was incredible. I’m gushing, but it deserves the gush. I’ll probably write a review tomorrow between lamenting the Giants and Jets respective butt whippings.
I expected the film to mellow them out and make them a hint more greatful. I even dropped the wifey off at home and took the (presently terrible) trio to Walmart to buy cookie dough and supplies for a Hot Dog Bar. That trip was disastrous . At one point the 4 yr old charged an elderly man riding a shopping scooter, forcing the man to swerve into a stack of boxed goods. At another point the 6 yr old disappeared entirely. I considered panicking for a full 3 minutes and then decided that two is a reasonable number of children to have, at which point he magically reappeared. By the time I made it home I discovered they’d snuck about $20 of stuff I never approved into the cart and jumped up my bill to ridiculous. I noticed the problem at the store, but so stressed was I to get out of there that I paid the tab and just left.
This happens every break. Call it the transition from light to dark or life without structure, but once school lets out the kids get maniacally bored. The excitement of a coming xmas isn’t helping, nor is the threat of Santa. I think it may be time to roll out the Krampus myth and find a way to scare em straight.
On the other hand, I could just give them something to do…