Taking a break from Bob today. It has been that kind of day overall. I’m tired and more than a little drained. I’ve had some time to reflect about perceptions, about the concepts of right and wrong, good and evil, happiness and satisfaction. All of this swirling around my life like an unwanted halo. I’m constantly drawn to the Steinbeck quote:
“when I face the desolate impossibility of writing 500 pages, a sick sense of failure falls on me, and I know I can never do it. Then gradually, I write one page and then another. One day’s works is all I can permit myself to contemplate.” John Steinbeck
It applies to how some people live life and, in many ways, the way I’ve contemplated living life. This isn’t necessarily a happy development. As my mother in law put it, ‘You think you’re happy with the choices you make but then you’re only happy 20% of the time. The other 80% is sadness.’ Without trying to sound like a person who is morbidly depressed (which I’m not, btw) I can explain that I’m someone who is at a crossroads in life. I’m still trying to figure out the best path to happiness.
People can be happy in a number of ways and for me it comes down to figuring out the things that make me least happy and eliminating them from my life. Afterwards I can start to think beyond the next day and regain the perspective of a long and satisfying life plan.
A lot of this sounds like a jumbled mess today. That’s probably why this is one of those blogs that won’t be sold…