My friend Dawn just threw an epic party for her son. She is not the first mom to straight up kill it with some activity or design or something spectacular for her kid. at this point it has become fairly commonplace that these moms are gonna crush it and make their kids’ lives amazing. Me, I do what I can, but frankly I wasn’t raised that way and I often feel ill equipped to be as amazing and productive as the people who I watch in awe. Still, this isn’t that blog. This isn’t going to be a sad sappy tale about how I cannot do great things for my kids or even the opposite, a wonder strewn story about how I’m going to do this, that, and the other thing. No, this is a different kind of blog–the kind of blog Bob Smith would be really in to. This is about accepting what can be done and what cannot.
There are a handful of things I’ve come to recognize as truth. (1) This place makes me stagnant. I’m speaking of the state, but given the legalities and pension tying me here, I cannot go anywhere, nor will I be abandoning my given profession anytime soon. So, this place has to have a more focused meaning. In other words, I mean the home. (2) I’ve accumulated a lot of stuff because I don’t pay a lot of attention to what I have or even what I want. Yeah, first world problems are rampant. (3) I don’t really do enough to remind my kids what being a good person is all about.
All three things are reasonable changes. I can change addresses or at the very least make some changes to the home that prevent me from being stagnant. This is reasonable and easy. I can’t afford to move, but I can afford to cut back on a lot of the things that keep me trapped here. That in of itself creates a sense of urgency that could snap me out of this middle class wealth coma. As far as the stuff goes, I’ve been reading Marie Kondo’s book on tidying up. She seems to be aware that everyone has too much and I’ve already started planning time and space to declutter. Finally, the last part is the hardest. I think it means telling my kids more about my life and what I do. It means peeling them off the video games and putting them in a book. It means playing outside and teaching them a jump shot. It means being 100% present, which I rarely am. For anyone.
I won’t just do that last bit for them. That last bit is the key. It is what separates people we think are fantastic from people we think are false. Being present is everything I want to do and be composed in a single instant. That’s ground zero for being the best version of me.
It might lead to better blogging too.
Some Thoughts:
- I’m pretty certain my blog posts are highly reflective of my headspace.
- Ever wake up and realize you’re not doing enough with your life? I prefer to call that Saturday.