Maybe the lull is finally over. I feel like I’m a lot closer to moving forward as a writer and a human than I have been in recent years. This brief flare of positivity is akin to the precious spark of two stones slapped together against kindling. It will not endure a strong breeze.
What I do need to get to doing is coming up with a plan for what I want over the next 16 months. I have vague ideas but nothing concrete has been laid out. It is mostly me, hiding from my stories, going through the motions, and trying to make it to and through the next Saturday. It is funny, being divorced is supposed to catapult you into the next phase of your life where you become this super motivated and super wonderful guy. I thought I was a decent guy, but in terms of catapult, I’d say we experienced a failure to launch.
Now I’m back to the edge of that cliff with my legs dangling over the edge and the fear to jump, because who truly knows what lies ahead and how it will affect you? I feel like the not knowing, though scary, is part of the joy.
Some Thoughts:
1. The visual interface of my wordpress is not working I have to go through the old school code window to get thing humming. It could be my computer. It is old and memory deficient. The kids have been using it to play all manner of games, so who knows what nonsense the dragged back from the web with them. Then again, the window in the corner of my screen is prompting me to upgrade to MacOS sierra, so that could be the problem altogether.