2.83: Waiver Wednesday

I wish I could be a fly on the wall. I wish I could’ve been a fly on the wall when the Giants GM watched his O-line get used by the Lions in the home opener and watched Eli look absolutely hapless in trying to locate receivers. I would’ve said, “Damn, I should’ve picked up some more folks in free agency.” Since Madden imitates life, I’m going to do that on my own. I’m going to take over that franchise, make immediate changes and roll to the SuperBowl.

Back in reality we are looking down the barrel of 0-3. This is already the worst start in the 92 year history of the franchise and it shows no signs of stopping. Odell was a decoy at only “80%” of his true power. Marshall is a decoy, which appears to be his actual role. He earned another trio of targets and caught one for posterity. He dropped one in typical Marshall fashion. Seriously, when he’s on he is fire and when he is off, he is trash. He’s been off all season and I feel that can be attributed to a lack of targets. He needs work to get rolling. Still, at his declined speed, he needs time to get open and Eli has none of that. Eli also looks like a scared rabbit–albeit one with a no legs or will to run.

The Giants suck right now. There is no O-line, no run game, and the defense is getting hurt because they’ve spent more time on the field than any other squad in the NFL. The Giants offense has barely cleared 200 yards combined in the two weeks of play. Three and out sounds like their motto.

In short, I’m pissed and I want a refund on my DirecTV package. I’ll watch. I’ll moan. I won’t expect more that 9 wins in the regular season. If that’s enough to scrape into the playoffs, we’ll win the Super Bowl. Because that’s how Giants roll.

 

Some Thoughts:

  1. I’ve been experiencing some very strange time phenomena. Yesterday I listened to a full minute of my audiobook while driving down a stretch of road and then, I kid you not, I did it again. Same stretch of road, same dialogue. Afterwards the book intoned, “Time gets strange when you’re near a thinny.” and I became convinced the universe was screwing with me. Then today I watched my son hit the timer on the microwave and turn to me and say, “I put it in for 30 seconds. Is that too long?” I responded that it was not, and as soon as I said that the timer went off. 30 seconds. In ten. Maybe I’m going crazy. Maybe I’m just living near a thinny that is starting to awaken. Stay tuned.

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