Let’s forget for a moment how much watching my kids grow up reminds me of how terribly elderly I’ve become. Instead let us put the focus on the freedoms the future might bring. Take work for example: Once my kids leave the house the cost of living will decrease. My partner and I can shrink to a smaller ‘home base’ living space and not have to worry about the kids having room to sleep and keep their stuff. More to the point, I will be past the brief joy of having kids to take to practice and to raise and wonder about. I’ll know they are on their own and our relationship will change and grow into a more evolved situation.
I won’t need to talk to my ex.
I’ll be back to a place where my partner and I do things that are about us all the time. I have not seen a sustainable version of that since before I had kids.
These kind of thoughts cross my mind as I watch my kids age up. I’m excited to see them grow. I’m excited to see them gone. I am excited about the future and what is to come for me and my partner. That excitement helps me get through nights like these when I cannot sleep and the sun threatens to rise before I ever close my eyes.