I’m old. I get that now. I get that because I’m 236 lbs, and below average muscle and bone density. I have a far too high BMI, and a pain behind my left knee when I walk. I’m old, out of shape, and ashamed of all of it. I got this way by being lazy. If I can point to one key regret in my life it is being lazy. I’ve remained a lazy and easily distracted person for so long that it feels foreign to even attempt anything else. Yet, I must. My heart is bad. My blood vessels are very bad. Death promises a swift visit and I’m not having any of it. That means major change. That means defiance of my environment and a training up to a level of focus I’ve avoided for the better part of a half century. See, I’m old, but I’m not quite done yet. I am training to be far from over.
Today I walked the standard 1.18 miles to get myself moving in the morning. It sucked and it wasn’t enough. It is part of a process of change that is going to be painful and necessary. I don’t know how much gym is required to make that change. I am reaching out in every direction to build a new way of being that is focused on enjoying moments and maintaining a rhythm to things. Only, it has to be a positive rhythm. It cannot be wake up, game, eat crap, game, TV, game, Tv, Game (apologies to Kendrick for the rip). Life needs to be about quality and about less garbage in, so less garbage out. I need to go back to school. I need to keep being a learner. I need to keep growing and taking pride in what I do because when you stop, you whither.
So, this is meant to be a touchstone for the turnback Tuesday. Let’s revisit this moment in a year and see how far I’ve come. Let that growth and that path to growth be a lesson to anyone else who, like me, has lost forward momentum and feels like they are stuck and wilting. Let’s learn how to grow together.