Month: July 2014

Often Chinese philosophies can be applied to other circumstances. One such circumstance is the Okinawa diet or hara hachi bu principle of healthy eating. The simplest way to describe this principle is as an 80% rule. You eat until you are 80% full, building your diet on vegetables, soy, and legumes and reducing the number of free radicals attacking your body. Basically, it is the principle of not maxing out and not poisoning yourself with what the world offers you easily. Incorporating this philosophy into your daily life is a wonderful way to change things for yourself emotionally and professionally as well.

I’m a case study for burnout. Every school year I push myself to the limit of what can be done. As such, everything that is done suffers from my being stretched thin. I’m overwhelmed vs. merely whelmed. If you work to 80% of capacity, you put yourself in a position to be able to do more, but to be doing enough that you’re not burning yourself out. Additionally, if you allow some of what you do to please the spirit (a spiritual vegetable if you will), then you create the opportunity to stay happy and grounded in your workspace.

This is just an outline of how to apple Hara Hachi Bu to your lifestyle. I scoured the internet to see if anyone else has come up with a plan built around this philosophy. I found this bit by Melanie Pinola from Lifehacker that dovetails nicely into the ideas outlined above. She talks about mindfulness and the work of author Justin Jackson. There are others who preach steps to mindfulness in the workplace. However, strategizing for a single place or condition isn’t really being mindful of yourself. It is operant conditioning at its worst.

Hara Hachi bu or whatever you adopt as part of your personal way of being has to be pervasive in your life. We are fragile creatures subject to breakdown largely because we do not allow ourselves the time and space for repairs. If we treated our things the way we treated ourselves it would be criminal. I’m slowly coming around to recognizing that I’m halfway through this one way journey and I still (if barely) have a chance to get my body and mind in a good place for the rest of the journey. It’d be silly to recognize that and then do nothing about it.

Some Thoughts:

1. At the end of the basketball season my 8-9 team took 4 losses against three wins. Here’s the kicker: We only lost to 2 teams. We beat every other team in the league, but the two teams we lost to only lost to each other. The 6-7 team completed a second straight undefeated year. There was a highly controversial tie born of a ref who called the game like it was a 4-5 contest and really let some stuff go down that set the kids’ learning back a season. The team that tied us is in for some hard lessons next year when none of what went down in our game will be allowed at the next level.
2. Having coached basketball for the first time, I see now what I need to work on in so far as skill development is concerned. My own skills are extremely limited, so I have a lot of learning to do. I will also need outside help to get the kids to perform at their optimal level.

The review began, ‘My grandson loved it and it made him happy for a while.’ I didn’t read any further because I knew what she was getting at. I’ve been there–live there, in truth–in this place where excitement fades quickly and what you are left with is the guilt of the purchase and a skein of disregarded plastic. As with fashion there will come a time when the old is new again, and you can scrape dust from the toys of last week so the children may revisit them today. This does little to address the new way of things: temporary. We live temporary lives in temporary houses using temporary things. We praise temporary, lauding Ikea over heirlooms. We fill our hunger for something good with something more.

Now things have seasons. We substitute the change of weather with the changing of our technology. Apple season is soon upon us. New devices will blow in with the fall winds, kicking up youthful excitement. I know more kids who gauge their lives by when the next big product or game is coming out than I know kids who can name one thing they built by hand. Even the school assignments come pre-fabbed from store bought kits and mom’s careful swirls of glue.

I am afraid that we’ve lost all sense of the value of hard work. We’ve settled into an acceptance of the new generational slogan and nodded and smiled at the old. ‘The Best Generation’ is long behind us, and ‘Work Smarter Not Harder’ rules the day. I’m afraid to trust my future to a generation built on microwavable meals and cellphones not expected to last a year before the new model comes out. On the one hand, they won’t settle for old, but on the other hand, they’d rather wait for someone else to build the new and meanwhile we slip further and further away from questioning until the thoughts of ‘why are we here on this planet’ fade into the rustle of windswept leaves.

 

48 (?) days left to the start of the NFL season and the most interesting football story out there is Radio City Music Hall telling the NFL that they won’t be able to fit them in this year. I find it interesting that Radio City is not making all possible accommodations to the league. Its almost as if they’d rather not be associated with the NFL or deal with the particulars of the draft format. Now Jay-Z offered his Brooklyn stadium, but no bites there. The draft will be in LA or Chicago this year and who knows where it winds up in the future.

Some Thoughts:

1. Shortest post in some time. I don’t have the energy to think of words to write.
2. I did want to mention how much my kids are into beyblade. Before long they’ll be submitting their (albeit rudimentary) videos to youtube and trying to build their own following. I cannot wait to help.

Sitting on the side of the highway with my windows rolled down it occurred to me how disconnected from nature I am. From my leather seat I could hear the singing of bugs in the distant brush and wondered for an instant what else existed out there. My kids were at a dude ranch two hours away, communing with nature in a way I haven’t in decades. Here I was, on the side of a road only interacting with nature by accident.

From time to time people ask me what I do when I’m in AZ, and everything I say pertains to man made things. There were the two times I visited the Grand Canyon, but beyond that I’ve remained disconnected from the natural world. This is in part, why I’m quick to say there is nothing to do in AZ. I fear my city nature stirs deep inside and walls me off from any thoughts of enjoying what nature set in front of me. I didn’t even realize AZ had lakes until a few months ago. I still haven’t efforted to see one.

The bottom line is I spend most of my life interacting with man’s technology and by that interaction I slip further away from linkages to the natural world. There must be a balance in order to achieve spiritual understanding. Though it is far too early for new year resolutions, it is long past due to resolve to make those deeper connections and live a more grounded life.

With final practices coming up on Friday, I’ve already moved ahead in my mind to the next sport–Soccer. I’m only head coach of the 4-5 team, and assisting with the others. This ought to give me the needed break to clear my headspace and start developing a legitimate plan for coaching kids to success. I recognized last year that my weaknesses in coaching are in instilling discipline and confidence.

For the next season I don’t think I’ll even have kids deal with a ball until the second week. I want them out there moving, running, exercising, and learning about working with each other. The ball and subsequent ball skills will come later. Maybe I’ll have an extension of what I’m doing with the teams for this last practice–an incentive based practice system where kids are moved to challenge each other to prove who is the best at skills.

Either way, I recognize that coaching is now an integral part of my life and identity. There are kids in this town who only call me coach. Odd, but acceptable behavior. Whats more, I think I like it.

My 7 yr old noticed me staring at the exposed beams of an old lodge and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was trying to figure out how the thing was built so I could replicate it when the time comes. He thought about that for a second and exclaimed, “So that’s why you watch Treehouse Masters!”

Nearing the end of my indoor improvement projects, I’m turning a portion of my thinking towards the outdoor projects. Articles like this have inspired me to finally set a budget, dig out my old books, and get started on some outdoor projects while the getting’s good. I recognize that it is crazy hot here in AZ, but because we are at the tail end of the summer buying season, there is no better time to purchase the things I need to make my backyard a useful and fun environment.

So, what does it take to make a backyard worthwhile in AZ? A pool, of course. In the absence of that, you’ll need grass (check!), a ball hoop of some sort (check!), good shade trees (check!), lots of seating (…not check), A grill Station (poorly done, so I must redo), and a fun area like a treehouse would be great. That last bit is the focus of the summer plan. I have additional plans to add gardening and clear out old foliage to give me the groundspace to do stuff. I also don’t have a tremendous amount of time before I need to dive headlong into my work life. So, I think I’ll start with cleaning up the backyard, pricing out the treehouse, and then put together a plan for the boys and I to build it before the fam arrives for whatever holiday we decide to hold here this year…

 

I used to want a harem. I wanted to have dozens of women who wanted to please no one but me. I was 12 at the time and starting to recognize my attraction to women and I figured that having more of them was smart, you know, in case I got bored. I’m a single child and I wasn’t about to share. Besides, who wants a woman that someone else has touched? I certainly didn’t. Fortunately, I turned 14 and realized I’d spent 24 months living in a media-inspired delusion.

Wanna hear something sad? Most of the world never woke up from that dream.

I can spend two years typing non-stop and not even scrape the surface of the ways we objectify women. From foot binding to modern advertising, most of what we do and see is directed at a patriarchy and reinforces the idea that women are to be lauded and hoarded while men are to be defined by the women they get. Because of this international ideology that is more often than not rooted in religion (See: Bible, Qur’an, etc..), we get situations where birth control law is determined by men, what women can and cannot wear is determined by men, and in many countries, who a woman can marry is determined by men.

The men are therefore treated like the rulers while the women are treated like the currency by which the men prove their rule. This isn’t the way it should be for any of us.

I have a constant need to have TV around as background noise. It is as though the silence of life frightens me so much that I refuse to accept it. Or, it could be as simple as a comfortable distraction from the boredom of daily life–something that doesn’t require a terrible amount of thought or dedication. This is the joy of TV. All I need to do is turn on the TV at a certain hour and enjoyment unfolds before my eyes. In truth, I don’t even need a certain hour these days. The ‘net and even the stations themselves are teeming with options to enjoy their shows on my schedule.

Suddenly its like I’m living in Wall-E’s world.

During this, the tail end of my vacation, I’ve been drawn far away from the basic wants and needs that powered me through the workdays. Getting so far away reminds me of what life is like when you are not there and how easy it is to get lost in work and how easy it is to get lost in that life outside of work. Today my mom asked me how I can deal with the boys each day without having them go to some sort of day camp. I remarked that we rarely worry about what to do anymore. Sure, there are the fights and blow ups and normal kid stuff, but it is usually close to three before we rise our heads and realize we’ve talked and played the day away. We watch TV, play games, and enjoy ourselves.

I’m full on rambling now. That means it is high time to revert to morning postings.

I tried to find the post from a year ago where my dog was peeing on the carpet and I, starved for solutions, asked the web for answers. I got none. I’m trying again. The new monsoon season brought a new round of peeing on the carpet. Our dearest d-o-g has opted out of going outside, preferring to make my carpet his bitch. There are a few ways we can go about solving this. The most obvious is to rid ourselves of the canine infestation and thus the canine urinary elimination situation. However, the kids love the dog. I still consider him…family…

So I’m back at one. I have a dog who likes to soil my carpet and make my house stink of urine. I have a family that deserves better. What to do? Some of my plans for tomorrow include spraying the carpets with a lemon juice-based solution meant to keep the dog at bay, or at least unwilling to soil.

If anyone else has ides, I’m listening.

 

Some Thoughts:

1. 24-21 loss in the 8-9 bball game taught me a valuable lesson: having more players is not a good thing. Our 3 wins came in games where we had a 9-10 player rotation where players could get comfortable with each other and get longer stretches on the court. Two of the 3 losses were in games where that wasn’t the case. Today’s loss was due to fairly obvious reasons. There was a 4 minute stretch early in the first quarter where we had 5 kids on the court that didn’t know how or care to play together as a unit. That unit turned a 4 point lead into 8 point deficit. The fact is, I should have called a timeout and threw in some other kids to help, but I didn’t. Coaching 101, man. That’s something I will work on.

This might as well be called the LeBron blog.

Once again I was surprised by LeBron James. He decided to forego the glitz and glamour of South Beach to return to Ohio where he was born and raised. James abandoned the Heat, leaving them with two more championships and a whole lot of great memories. He eschewed the chances for another Big 3 run in order to return to his familial roots in Cleveland. I couldn’t be happier for the dude. It seems now that things lined up for him just right. He is the returning leader of a rising franchise, he instantly redeemed himself to the media and the petulant fans who hated that he’d made the smart choice to leave in the first place, and along with Nike’s own Johnny Manziel, he’s brought the flash to Cleveland.

The Manziel connection is interesting and needs to be explored further. With James seeing himself as a mentor, it is interesting to note that Manziel, who is desperately in need of a mentor, and James are close friends. This return feels less orchestrated and conspiratorial than that, but the stars are aligned for Ohio to rise in two sports.

I was touched by LeBron’s letter to the fans. He gets it. He sees that this is about more than basketball. It is about friendships and challenges and doing right by the people who raised you. I still don’t think Dan Gilbert, owner of the Cavs gets it. I still feel he is a guy who saw his golden goose fly away and now is smug about having that goose back. Still, that doesn’t even matter. LeBron isn’t going back for him. He’s going back for his legacy, for his fans, for the kids he supports through his charities.

He’s going back to put Cleveland on the map.