Disciplining kids in a split household is a difficult thing. I’ve watched kids decide that they don’t want to be in one place and be supported in leaving that place for good. In this case it was with just cause and really wasn’t resisted by the other parent, but I have a tendency to put myself in other people’s shoes and worry quite a bit as a result. All this is to say that I disciplined my youngest and it ended with him holed up in his room for the rest of the evening and into today. Normally this would be okay. However, in this specific instance he decided to call his mom this morning and ask her to pick him up. She refused. I know this because he told me. This only deepened his disappointment in the entire situation teaching him one or more valuable lessons. The first is that there is no escape from punishment. The second is that –in his mind– he can’t rely on his parents to get him out of situations like this one.
I want to focus on the second one. Now this second one is largely speculation on my part, as he never actually argued that he felt betrayed or couldn’t rely on anyone. The truth is he’s bored and sad and largely a spoiled brat at this point in his life who is completely unaccustomed to not getting his way. This is crushing him, and while I feel a twinge of sadness for his emotional sag, screw that kid. He had it coming.
He’s gotten very used to doing what he wants when he wants and I know I am partly responsible for that. Slamming the gate down hard on those habits is going to create neccesary tension between us, but the kid is at the point where he is trying not to respect me or any other parent figure and especially not his siblings.
So, I end up blogging it out on a Sunday morning while he mopes around the house like a blanket covered sith lord. Such is the way of the Talis-house. They mope, I write, we move on…
Eventually.