Month: August 2021

As part of the new writing strategy I am working on multiple projects at once. It gives me a day or two a week to not think about the novel and get caught up in going down a wrong path–especially in this intense layout and brainstorming phase. That brings me to Fantasy Day, in which I am taking the day to think about about a project entirely different from science fiction. The fantasy project is a culmination of ideas I’ve been living with since the 1st grade. Now a lot of those ideas are clearly evolved or have been removed from consideration as a result of learning more about medieval culture and reading fantasy over the years. I feel that I’ve come to a point where I am ready to build the world I’ve always wanted to build. So, every week I am taking a day to hop into fantasy land and see what I can come up with.

Some Thoughts:

1. School is about to hit come Monday and I’m not there yet…

Safe to say I’ve been in a lurch the past few days. Call it a rough transition. Between some body issues hampering me (kneck and back because I’m old as crap) and preparing to move headlong into a semester I’m not quite prepared to begin, I’ve been a bit of a mess. Thankfully I have a partner that keeps me grounded. I’m probably not the best version of myself for her lately either, and that is something else to work on. People don’t seem to be the best versions of themselves right now. Just this morning I found myself in Walmart and in the middle of a series of unfortunate moments; each desperate in their own way. It started with the man who’d wet his pants. I felt bad for the guy, but he tried to act like it didn’t happen. He openly worked to pretend there was nothing going on and when people did look he said, “Nothing to see here.” proving that he knew what there was to see. I want to imagine he was there to grab new pants, but I didn’t stay in the moment long enough to find out. Later I wound up in a conversation with a wheelchair bound worker who really just wanted to have a conversation with someone. I didn’t want it to be me, and that was tough, because I have always had a hard time breaking away from those moments. There is something about people who need people that has always made me want to stick around and be supportive. Put that on my gravestone: He was supportive.

It’s something at least.

Normally this would’ve been an evening of football, but Covid took that from us this eve. Politics did additional damage at the high school level as several players transferring to the school were ruled ineligible to play for the season. These ineligibilities were handed down unfairly from school to school as some kids who transferred were not allowed to play and other who transferred–often from the same school but to other, more football-known programs were allowed to play immediately. There are lawsuits in the work as I speak. Football is crazy. I think it may finally be getting to be too much.

I haven’t said too much but I’ve said enough for now. Ten minutes, you know.

Let’s get right into it. I believe the TE position is where a fantasy coach can make a lot of points. However, I also believe that the position is a late draft position and needs to be handled after QB and RB but before Defense and WR. Yep. Take the qbs and backs early and then go back for the pass catchers. I know, I play PPR so what the hell? Here’s the truth: There are a lot of solid pass catchers out there. 8 guys had 100+ catches. 15 had 80+ and that tells me I can wait for a 25+ point seasonal difference. I can find someone in round three who can catch, but can I find someone in round 3 to run the ball effectively or throw it?

Tight End

Waller and Kelce are an absolute lock, but Dalton Shultz caught 63 balls last year, people! That was on only 89 targets. He’s quality points. I believe that you should be looking for guys like that who will get looks especially when their team has a bad D like the Cowboys do. He’s a guy to look for. Any others? Yeah, I have a few sleepers. One of them is the mad dropper Evan Engram. He has some serious hands issues from time to time, but he has to be fantastic this season if he wants to get extended. So, he will be. I trust that Danny Dimes has learned to bailout faster and that will put Engram in a space with a linebacker who doesn’t really have a chance.

late Tuesday eve and I am blogging from the phone because I didn’t get it done in the office earlier in the day. I didn’t get a lot of what I wanted done today but I do feel like I made progress. I got a little bit off my plate and found myself a step closer to creating a mental schedule that makes sense. Now I need to execute and get on page with what I need to be doing every day and not slipping back into the land of not writing…

of course I am also blogging from bed so…

it feels like I have a lot of loose threads being tugged and in need to tie them up as I roll into the first week of classes. I’m not properly excited for the school stuff—largely because I am not properly prepared. I expect to get the office back in shape tomorrow and then sketch out a schedule where I can be productive and have the time with my partner and family I want and even carve out a little me time that isn’t writing—read: game

I stumbled into a chain of progressively more awkward conversations tonight only realizing three in that they were in fact the same conversation with the same purpose, though the subject matter shifted. What it was really about was an outpouring of negativity. The boys in question were talking badly about everything as if as a part of an exercise to get it out of their system. I hope it worked. My inclusion in the conversation only made it tougher for what they were apparently trying to accomplish. I suppose their vocal release is the equivalent of how I play some video games. I need to get it out of my system and until I do it just builds up and makes me a worse human being. Instead of calling this the negativity cycle I probably should have called it outlets, because thats what I am really talking about and what is really going on in these interactions.

Some Thoughts:

1. Tripping and stressed out tonight. No clue what brought it on. I just need to get out of that cycle.
2. Looking forward to practice tomorrow.
3. Not looking forward to Madden so much. The entire thing is loosing its luster. I think they’ve gone in a wrong direction by focusing on next gen and forgetting the millions who still play current gen. It is a mess.

I gotta be honest: watching my kid’s former youth football team be more successful after we left hurts a little. Obviously they were trending towards that level of success, so it is no surprise. The coaching is solid and the talent has increased across the board. It does conjure old feelings of failure from as far back as I can remember of teams I’ve been a part of getting better when I leave. Of course, correlation is not causation. The only reason I could play D1 football was because the team sucked and was desperate to cultivate talent when they couldn’t recruit it. Same goes for semi-pro. As for this situation here: It shouldn’t be a situation at all. To be clear, I should not care and should not focus on it at all… yet here we are. Whenever I hear about them I do in fact tune in and pay attention to what is happening. It is just my personality and competitive spirit to want to dive in and learn all I can and hoard scores and figure out who is doing what, etc…

I suppose you could call me an obsessive compulsive person to a point. I want to be all in all the time, but as I age (ungracefully) I am learning to temper these thoughts and feelings and become someone who strikes a more precious balance. It is active work. I have to tell myself not to look into these football things when they pop up. It is hard work. I am still learning how to do it. Normally, I rely on cross addiction. If I get obsessive about A and A is unhealthy then I try to focus on B, which is supposed to be a healthier obsession. I recognize on the surface that it doesn’t fix the problem. Like delayed gratification, it is not something that comes easily or often. Yet the work continues…

This is not the Novell either. No, this is a late night Saturday blog following a big energy draining day and practically no sleep from the night before. It’s what you call one of those free thought and waning state of mind blogs. I’ve had a day full of sports practices, driving around, dealing with my oft obnoxious and privileged kids and launching the final dragon ball hunt.

The last one is worth conversation we launched the hunt successfully after a series of website and creative process driven false starts. Some of it was me just being an ass but some of it was tech and some of it was uncertainty about the direction of this last hunt. We persevered and launched the challenge which ended a little bit ago. They earned multiple dragon balls—theee of the seven!

it only gets harder from here. The next challenge is very Canadian, and I’ll explain more about after they solve the clues to get there. I’m thinking a cipher clue…

all in all it’s been a physical day and I’m drained. Thankfully these ten minutes blogging on this phone are up. I can finally rest.

“It is impossible to be successful if you spend all your time looking for instant gratification.” says Author Mawi Asgedom. I think he’s hit the problem of the modern generation. We have very short attention spans and a high expectation of instant gratification that is attached to all of these short form versions of entertainment that get us quick-hit joy moments that don’t last and, beyond that, are not entirely fulfilling. Lasting gratification is a thing that must be earned and as a result we have fewer and fewer people who seem capable of sustaining what is required to reach that joy. As a result we have reconfigured success to being good at these moments–to being a good gamer overnight, to being an overnight sensation, to being someone who gets all the glory but doesn’t put in any of the work.

The idea of working hard for ten years and reaching success is, well, crazy. Who does that? I don’t even think I have that left in myself. It takes a lot more energy to get to the point where you are willing to sustain that output long enough for delayed gratification. That’s the argument I am making here: It is harder to get up for something that is going to take a while to do. It takes less to do what is easy. It takes more to do what is hard. Now, this simple aphorism isn’t new, but I think it bears considering. What message does it send? Does that realization make you feel like, yes I need to work hard or does it leave you feeling for the easier path? I truly believe that is a reflection on the self.

Which brings me back to writing. Putting together a story is not easy work. It is hard and grueling and often results in abject failure. However, the reward is worth the energy. The understanding that you’ve created a lasting piece of work is worth the work you put in to make that a reality.

I spent the past two days on the beach enjoying the last gasps of vacation before the school year kicks in for my partner and I. This was a much needed vacation–not in the sense that we needed to get away again after already having a wonderful almost three weeks in Seattle, but in the sense that we needed a really good cali run and I feel like we got exactly that out of this trip.

So, what does that mean? Well, we were looking forward to spending quality time together as a couple–a pair–a partnership and enjoying what it felt like to be out in the sand and under the sun and not having to worry about the other aspects of our lives that hold such time and attention. Mission accomplished. Love needs that. Love needs time between two people because the rest of the world actively works against love. I know this because my first marriage failed because we weren’t together and purely about each other for any real time and after a while we weren’t about each other hardly at all. The thing that binds a couple together has to be the couple and not the circumstance or the kids or any of that stuff. I’m grateful to be in a partnership where I am in it purely because I’m about her and she is in it purely because she is about me.

Some Thoughts:

1. To begin: I’m super happy to be coaching this year. I feel like I’m going out on top and getting to a place where I understand the people responsible for the activity where my kids spend all their time and these are the right people to help them grow. That makes me happy.
2. That being said, I am equally happy to go through the experience knowing the end is in sight. Already there is talk of a spring team and all that blah blah. Yeah, I am out. Kid is gonna focus on training up outside of the organized sport and come back in the spring of 23 ready to build his own path to high school success.
3. This is the final Dragon Ball hunt! the hunt begins this weekend. It is time for it to be over as well. I worry at least one of the two is too old for it, and it isn’t the older one…

Welcome to the two part pre-draft edition of the Waiver Wire. The goal for these next two Wednesday’s is to figure out who is worth drafting and who is not in light of the upcoming NFL season. This is a positional look, but also a look at what order to grab your players, so here we go:

The Strategy

I play PPR leagues. While the point rules vary within each, one thing is certain: The number of balls you catch directly translate into points. In one league the QB points far supersedes this number, so in that league a QB is gold. In the other two it is about them hands, so my suggestion is to pick a RB or WR that has a high catch volume first. So, I’m going to start there

Running Backs

Christian McCaffery a.k.a Run CMC ought to be the first pick in all draft formats this year. Though injured last season, he has been a consistent point horse for his entire career and serves as the backbone of the Panthers offense. Are there legitimate questions about what that offense is going to look like under new leadership? Yes, but we saw the answer last year pre-injury: More of the CMC show.

Somewhere nearby Alvin Kamera is screaming ‘Cap!’ with all the truth and ferocity of a multi-time pro-bowler. The man is not wrong, and while both he and McCaffery are dealing with new QBs, he is dealing with a crowded backfield as well. CMC doesn’t have a reliable back to do what he does. He does have a change of pace guy who will steal some goal line work, but that isn’t enough to change the vote.

But what about Saquon or Henry or Cook? Henry should be your 3rd choice. Then Cook and then Chubb…. yeah. I’m a lifelong Giants fan and a Barkley fan since before he put on the blue. Still, he isn’t a sure thing early on. He gains value as the season progresses to be sure and is far from a sleeper, but if the others are available you have to take them first.

Quarterbacks

Honestly, there are no surefire QB standouts this year beyond Prescott. He’s that dude to be sure. Behind him I can pick 10 other guys who will put up tremendous numbers, but they don’t have the kind of offense he does. He carried so hard last year that folks began to question what Zeke could even do without him. He’s the standout. Rodgers, Mahomes, Wilson, Allen, Jackson, Murray will all give you SOLID numbers that are similar to each other in terms of total points but in different ways. If Dak comes back right then he will be the top guy.