So much of what I do with my time is an effort to avoid having to engage in real thought about the important things in life. It started back when I was a kid, I the moments where any real length of silence reminded me that this might be what death is like and the idea of that halting state frightened me so thoroughly that I sought out someone to hold on to. I’m older now and far less prone to what I’ve come to recognize as panic attacks, but the habits of youth stay with me. It is only in the moments of silence that I realize it at all.
There is nothing so important in the world of sports that I need to turn on ESPN (followed by a short turn to the NFL Network) first thing in the morning. For a time I excused this behavior in the way I excused watching a few minutes of CNN—these stories they report will be conversation pieces to the greater world, and if I don’t know or delve into the story then I’m not part of the world.
When I am out in the world beyond my doorstep and don’t have the power to participate in such frivolities as internet, I find that I turn to books to learn and the signal of written words to be able to write better and learn about the craft I love.
Maybe that’s a good thing.
Some Thoughts:
- NFL season is approaching. I am looking forward to a solid fantasy season and a great season for my G-men. It is time to return to glory.