By definition despair is the complete loss or absence of hope. After last night it feels like I know a thing or two about that feeling. How do you get rid of it? How do you move from hopelessness and feeling emptied out and on the constant verge of collapse to making enough forward emotional progress to get through the day and into the next one? Well, I made it this far. I am no expert. In truth I am holding on by a gossamer thread, but I am still here. I also know that I will be here tomorrow and that, dear reader, is progress.
So, what have I learned? Let’s break it down in ten minutes (or less at this point).
- The Power of Feet on Pavement. I walked around for a very short time today, and for the most part it was helpful. Getting up and getting moving can definitely force the mind to break from the strain of failure. If possible do some real exercise. I didn’t because I didn’t have it in me but maybe I could have if I tried. One thing is clear: Sitting in bed is a recipe for destruction.
- Dive into story. This is also known as avoidance. I watched an episode of Alias and it distracted me long enough to get up and get moving if only a little.
- Work. Double edged sword here. Work can be a refuge or a trigger. Today was more in the trigger column than anything else, so this is a tough one. I found moments of distraction in the job but it in no way made me happy. Still, the point is staving off despair, not suddenly being happy again.
- Play Games. Madden helped. So did Clash Royale. Of course if you hit a losing streak then you’re back at square one, but at the same time it can be therapeutic to take an L and shake it off. It means that you recognize that there is more out there and there is a chance to be successful and eventually, happy.
- Music makes the heart sing. This is a tricky one but it can be the most powerful force if done right. Stick to the upbeat and happy stuff. I let Jack Harlow and Pharell pop in my eardrums. I tried Tracy Chapman but that lingered on depressing long enough to precipitate another crash. Definitely avoid Sarah Mac. Definitely
- Sex. Haven’t tried it, but I am certain the act of lovemaking chases the bad thoughts away. I mean, how could it not?
Some Thoughts:
- I didn’t say write. That counts too. After writing this list I felt a little better about sharing.
- So I guess sharing counts too…