I would love to go to a football game again. I would love to be a part of a giant crowd roaring their approval. I want to see a concert–any concert so long as it is one whose crowd is large and demands the sound cranked up high and for the day after my ears still reverberate with the passion of the evening. I’d like to see a show. I’d like to know again what it is like for the lights to dim and the actors to take their spots upon the stage and, in that moment, become an observer transported into someones dream–or perhaps someone’s nightmare in the theater pressed close to a hundred people as amazing unfolds on the screen.
I want to visit a theme park. I want to see Monster Truck’s race. I want to be on a beach filled with people loving the sand and surf. I want to know that we have come through this and we are alive and we are changed and all can be what we hope in some small fashion, because resilience is what makes us great and what makes this world great.
This is what I want. This is not what I expect.
There will be football games and concerts and shows. The theaters are open and will fill again. Monster Trucks will race to screaming crowds without me. The beaches are open and will be drenched with sunbathers. All of this is coming to pass and I’ve yet to define my role in it. I have a life to live with my partner and some thinking to do about what that means for us.