Blogging from my phone and it’s hard to see the letters. The nights and early mornings are like this, and it makes me nervous about diabetes. Who knows what is really wrong with me. It could just be too much screen time but it still sucks. Odd day. I’ve come to recognize the connection I have with youth football as an addiction and as a missed opportunity in life. I say this as I recently became aware that the team my kid left was just on TV during the Raiders game. This is not the first second or even fifth time this has happened. He’s adjacent to talent but, like me, teams get noticed once he leaves. I hope it is just that he’s at a level of talent that puts him in that conversation as opposed to it being about his inability to capitalize on the talent he has (me) or that talent not being enough (also me) which is the story of my life thus far.
but this is 7 and lucky number 7 is about growth and change and finding a way to be your greater self as opposed to the other guy. This is about accepting that the youth football period of my life is over and done and I did as good as I did as a coach and a dad in that. No sense in regrets. Time for this last kid to take the torch and find his way to success on his own terms. Failure is a choice but it is not my choice to make. I made mine and did my thing and it went how it went and I made connections in that world and now they don’t know or want to know me and that’s okay too. I’m on to the next thing… once I settle into whatever that is.
maybe that’s the real issue here/ I haven’t moved on because I haven’t decided what to move on to. I’m still here in the space and not filling it with the new.