10 Minute Rule

Almost a year now. 350 posts means that in 15 days or so it will be the day I fell off and did not do the blog. Feels like a lot longer than a year. That in itself says a lot because it tells me how much happens in a solitary human year–how fast time moves and how slowly. The fact that I’ve been at this new iteration for almost a year is wild. I’ve been through a lot in that time. My family has gone through a lot in that time, and the ten minute reflection is going to be a big one for me personally. But we aren’t there yet.

I’m watching the Lady Talis doing her routine outside right now and realizing that she’s starting to get back into a vibe. Meanwhile, I am thinking about the pool and how much it will cost to drain and clean, the AC replacement(s) and all the other upkeep costs on top of the tax payments (because marriage is a financial hit, folks). I am afraid of imminent collapse, and maybe that is a huge part of why the contrast in my household stresses me so much. The wife and I worry about these things, but the kids who are grown and working don’t think about any of it or even care to be helpful to the household. I suppose that is how kids be–no matter how old they are.

My body is truly showing the stress.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Minnesota shooting of Venezuelan man is the latest where video evidence contradicts ICE accounts” Yep, the hits keep coming…
2. I don’t mean for this always to be so political, but the news is a reflection of what the general populace is expected to take notice of, and this is what keeps popping up. I need a better algorithm to be sure. That’s a job for next week’s Talislegger.
3. What’s wild is how much my algorithm is pulling up ads that tell me to get the hell off the youtube. It is right!
4. Also this one: “A storm system sweeps across the Southeast triggering tornado warnings and damaging winds” What is wild is that the photo is of the Statue of Liberty… But why?

I am starting with a loss. I didn’t know the kid, but my son did. He collapsed on the field yards away from my son and passed a day later. That is a scary and tragic situation. It is also another loss for a kid who has seen more death close to him before 19 than most Americans see in twice that time. It was once a year for a couple of years there. This is the first one since high school. It is a tragedy, and I don’t want to make it all about my kid. This was a young man at the top of his athleticism taken by problems he never knew he had. I hope they find a way to honor this young man.

Honor. That is a strange word. We honor traditions. Today is a tradition I am honoring. In truth I am using it as an opportunity to spend time with my wife and away from writing. I need it. I need her. I need the reset and time to clear my head and feel like myself again. I am drowning in sadness and cannot fully understand why. I feel like I am on pins and needles walking through this emotional wasteland of a home. It isn’t even about the wife in that regard. She is trying to stay up. So am I. Nobody else cares about anyone else’s feelings. Meanwhile, I am clearly deep in mine.

I need to get away for a while.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Amazon scraps partnership with surveillance company after Super Bowl ad backlash“
2. Here is the dystopian ad in context: So… They can use AI to scan your door cam for facial recognition? Yeah. That’s not gonna work for me.

We are cooked. We cooked ourselves, really.

Every meeting I am in is less about teaching and more about gatekeeping and CYA. The entirety of what we talk about is about how to STOP students from doing things and how to PROTECT ourselves or our students in some fashion. We are spending less and less time talking about new learning and integration. The main (or new) problem is AI. We’re shook at the thought that students might be cheating the learning, as though if they get a great grade in our class and don’t know anything it becomes a loss for us. On a basic level it does. However, does it really? Is our job to teach or to troll? Is our role to dispel the act of cheating? Has it ever been? I want my role to be that as Hunter Boylan described: Meet them where they are at and take them as far as I can.

My classes are built on explaining and developing the iterative process. I want them to learn the fundamental tools so they can use those cognitive tools and strategies for whatever technology they are using in the future. It is foolish to assume they won’t use AI. It is getting to the point where it is impossible not to. I have to tell the google bot not to write a dang email for me.

This is how the world is moving right now. We are moving forward and the system is treating us like the clamps or cuffs designed to hold people back. Let’s teach to the future. Not the past.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the day: “Teachers describe immigration enforcement’s impact on classrooms in challenge of Trump policy” Elementary schools, folks.

Been watching a few too many scary videos. In truth, I’ve been watching a lot of uselesstube as background, which in reality feels like a way to avoid writing. I’m struggling here as a writer and in general struggling to focus in general. The sort of thing that youtube doesn’t make easier. Here is what I need to do. I need to shut off the system and reset outdoors where I can focus on the writing away from the internet and away from the distractions that I am using to keep myself not locked in and mildly distracted.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the Day: “What to know about EPA decision to revoke a scientific finding that helped fight climate change” So now we’re really not interested in solving the climate crisis… In fact we are trying to make sure there is no proof of a crisis. We are heading in the wrong direction and don’t appear to be aware of the fact that we only have one planet. Wall-E ain’t coming to save us, folks…
2. I’m trying to get locked in with a hour by hour system of how to get working and get myself focused, because this is not working at all. Heck, I am watching more creepy vids as I write this.
3. Kind of a cool moment in time where my son is having his first valentines with a girlfriend. I’m loving that he is having these experiences. Young love is a great one. Doesn’t always end well, but that is part of the journey too.

I want to start by saying after several great calls with coaches from around the FCS, my youngest has received offers to play at Idaho and Northern Arizona! I’m really excited about this, because it shows that the work is paying off and the talent (and clear potential) is showing through. Each of these three players is better than the last. The first one should have been pure track athlete and the ACL injury ought have informed me of that from the beginning, but it did not. I messed up his athletics career, so I will always hang on to that one like a Manning. The Manning comparison is apt. Obviously Peyton was the G, but Eli (which is the same name as my 3rd) benefited from his knowledge and experience. That is what is happening here. On the defensive side of the ball.

My UNI-playing kid and I were just hashing this concept of how the world has changed over social media. Now we have 8th graders sending out social media announcements about which high schools they are down to choosing from. That is ridiculous. The hype has become so toxic that it is hard to distinguish hype from talent. I think the film is where it shows (when not edited specifically to lie). Fortunately, this kid’s film shows. In his last call with a Washington school that will remain unnamed, the coach argues that he should have 11 FBS offers based on what he sees on tape and team needs.

We’re waiting for those offers to happen.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the Day: “FAA lifts temporary closure of airspace over El Paso” They did what where? Why?! Apparently there were “Mexican Cartel” drones flying about and the US Military disabled them. Now if I am reading this right (as a false flag attack) this can be considered a military incursion setting the stage for military intervention into Mexico. Cool.
2. No, not really cool at all. This is going to go badly. Like Tom Clancy Novel turned video game badly…

I almost missed the post over a bad back. I intended to retire it earlier but found myself bedridden. If I’d worked it out earlier I would have done this as a turn back Tuesday and reflected on the last time my body fell into disrepair. I don’t remember when it was but it felt a lot like this. I managed to make it to class but didn’t get out of the desk chair for 2 and a half hours. I taught from behind the desks I probably do that more than I should, but this one made more sense. Getting up was hard. Getting back to the car was harder.

is it supposed to be this way in your 40’s? It was this way in my 40’s to be sure it wasn’t frequent and this is the first major malady of the half century—or after it to be specific

here’s hoping no more follow.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonjers headline of the day: Armchair detective landlord social media as search for Guthrie mom continues… I’m hearing this case is very huge news in NYC. It’s getting more and more traction here in AZ where it’s actually happening.
2. Here’s to a better tomorrow for everyone

Ever get to that point where you’re nearing the end of a draft, you look up and realize you’re short on words? Rarely happens to me but with this most recent project I am discovering exactly how little I apparently have to say on the subject. I have been dodging the writing of it all day as a result, because I got nothing. Not even a little something. I woke up at 2:30 in the morning, meaning I’ve been up for fourteen hours now and I’ve still got nothing. Nada.

Nein.

S, I’m here trying to put ten minutes into a blog and not be distracted. I’m trying to avoid the quick dopamine fix of a youtube video or anything else out there that will keep me from getting back into a work headspace so I can finally grind out this last bit of noise. The cool thing is I know this worked so well on the coast of Victoria, BC. That beach was zen. I had no internet. Nothing but this laptop and the need to grind out more chapters. Here I am trying everything in my power to write and it is teaching me a lot about the man I am vs. the man I want to be. Dang sure I know how to get there if I am willing to put in the work.

Guess I ought to go try it for a little while.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers headline of the day: “Cuba says airlines can no longer refuel on the island as US blockade deepens energy crisis” What are we doing here?

“I think the dryer is on fire,” His son said and then added, “Hey, that rhymes!”

Karim isn’t listening. He is studying the piece of paper in his hand. He found it in his pocket, crumpled like it had been there a while. There are letters written there. It is in his handwriting–his long swoops and curls forming letters that looked closer to hieroglyphs than a living language. No, that’s not quite right. It is different than that. Somewhere between the Japanese Katakana his son stared at on the animes and hieroglyphs. 

“Serioiusly, dad. Do you smell that?”

He does. Dryer lint makes a smell worse than burnt popcorn. More dangerous too, but his eyes never leave the paper. Has he seen these symbols before? His mouth moved numbly, trying to shape sounds from a memory so deep it could’ve been buried before he learned how to speak. 

“Dad?” Small hands on his arms, shaking him. 

The first syllable comes out of him like a moan. He feels each part of the letter move through him. He smells smoke closer now. Maybe in the fireplace?  Hears a snap and a sizzling crash.

“Dad!” Frantic now. Shaking him but he’s too big to move. He has to get the entire word out of him. The last syllable dies in an exhale. He slumps forward, the paper falling from his trembling hand.

There’s a sound, like a boy yelling. His boy?

“Cam, why are you yelling?”

Cameron stares at him frantically; his eyes wide and dumbstruck. Only now does he see the fireplace roaring, the smoke rising from the laundry room at the corner of his eye. The fire alarm is yowling. 

“What did you do, Cam?”

But Cam isn’t listening. He’s staring at a crumpled piece of paper on the floor. There’s something written on it. Karim thinks he’s seen it before. It’s in his own handwriting.

That ought to be the vibe. I am winding down on this last day of the week and winding up for the last football game I need or want to care about until April 25th (UNI Spring Ball). The chance one of my own kids appear in the big game one day is growing. The youngster has gotten offers from Idaho and NAU as of today and his big bro is already at UNI (of Kurt Warner fame). Crazy to think they could be playing each other in two years. Crazier to think they could make the pros. I don’t want to jinx their ride to the top. I just want to watch and smile.

Oh, Super Bowl stuff… also don’t want to jinx. I really think the Seahawks are the better team. I do worry about Maye’s ability to run. He doesn’t run to extend plays, so it isn’t going to be a scramble and throw kind of night, but he does get first downs. Extending the downs is going to be a problem unless they can maintain contain, and it has been a problem. Also… Let’s just hope Sam Darnold is up to the task. I think the Rams game showed that he is.

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the Day: Republicans rarely criticize Trump in his second term. A racist post briefly changed that
2. I could’ve (and should have) gone with this one: Immigrant whose skull was broken in eight places during ICE arrest says beating was unprovoked
3. Or this one… Especially this one: “What to watch on Day 2 of the Milan Cortina Olympics: Lindsey Vonn goes for gold with torn ACL” She’s doing what?!

Alright, I’m coming around to doing the hard thing.

I think I need to stop playing Slay the Spire for a few weeks. I think I need to avoid games outside of Minecraft for a few weeks. No starting the new. Finish what I need to do and lock in on what really matters in terms of moving forward. Crafting is a pleasant enough respite. Maybe a little bit of Mario with the fam, but mostly I want to keep my focus on what is ahead of me. What’s ahead of me right now is…

Some Thoughts:

1. Bonkers Headline of the Day: “Trump shares a racist video that depicts the Obamas as primates” Yeah, of course he did. I’m certain his supporters will say the man was just making a silly joke and we all take things too seriously, but that’s just what people say when they want the racist thing to be okay. They want the racist thing to be okay. Remember the ‘good old days’ of America where you could say stuff like that and it wasn’t a problem? America was GREAT then. We need to Make America Great Again… Dang, the whole thing is so obvious that it is hardly worth breaking down. The worst part is, I think everyone knows it and simply chooses to avoid discussion because, why discuss?
2. I’m learning that in order to have friendships, you need to work at it on your end as well. I legitimately don’t have any real work friends. I’ve been fading at the social end of the job spectrum for a decade, but now I am not even a ghost. Not sure I’m totally okay with that, but I feel mostly okay with that. My focus on the students hasn’t faded at all, which is the most important part to me. That being said, one of the things I’ve long brought to the table was establishing a sense of community amongst my peers. That is probably what I’ve been best at over the course of my life. Yet, whenever I do establish a community–a really good community–that beasts tends to grow without me and away from me. This is the cycle of things in my 50+ years of existence. I’m a fringe guy. Not a core guy. Yet I help build that core.
3. It is cool how reading a passage or hearing a term can totally refresh the dedication to a concept or at least give it some new life. I have this ten book series in my mind, and it is based on these principles (commandments). I just learned a new one today and it felt like blood moving through old veins. One day in the next five years I’ll go write that stuff. Once I clear off my old plate of food…