Oh great game Gods, I cry your pardon! I have strayed. I have felt my faith wither beneath me, rushing from me as tide draws water from the shore. I am not the gamer I was. I ask if this cloud of disinterest (you’re going to have to ignore the mixed metaphors here, folks) is of my own doing or if it is you who hath forsaken me?
I seek only truth and understanding.
Games have increased in number and beauty. There are so many platforms–too many to keep up. I’ve played nearly all platforms. I own nearly all the platforms. Yet I believe I play less than ever before. Is this truth or perception? I know that I play games on my phone. I cannot track the amount of time spent doing so. I know I play far less on the ps4 than in the history of my gaming life. I watch my children sink four hours into Fortnite and I play once, if at all. I am not engaged. This does not rise to the level of that which once sucked me in wholly as if the world on the screen was of far greater importance, demand, and even depth than the world of tactile sensations all around me. When I found EvE Online I played so much that it felt like I needed to put in a second work day just to advance in the game. The lure of levels and loot was so complete that I worked at the game more than my job and even during my job. I wanted to explore the great realm. I wanted to tell my story in the digital space.
RPGs are where the Martin brothers were born. I played both characters (call signs: Spartan and Jaeger) and wrote stories about them and their great Mechs as they strove to find their place in the Battletech realm. Games defined me. Playing was my pastime. Now I play less. I love less. Yet, I fear I have not replaced that love with other interests. It has simply retreated to a place beyond my reach. I know not how or why or to what end.
Some Thoughts:
- LeBron James is a basketball deity. Straight up. He remains the best player in the sport today. Yet not even he is enough to push the Cavs to a NBA title.